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you fell in a pit (quizpuzzle)

Farted by PhantomCatClock, May 16, 2019, 03:51:48 PM

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you fell in a pit. details + answer descriptions in main post below.

Option A
Option B
Option C
Option D
Option E
Option F
Option G
Option H
Option I
Option J
a butt

PhantomCatClock

The pit is too wide to have any hope of Spider-Manning up, the walls are unbreakable and undentable. All you have is a working toilet, a comfy bed, a computer with internet access, and a button that summons a random tasty food. The button can be used as many times as you wish.

OPTION A press the button a bunch and climb out of the pit with your pile of unlimited tasty foods


OPTION B engorge yourself on tasty foods and neglect the working toilet, then eventually climb your pile of shit to freedom


OPTION C engorge yourself on tasty foods and neglect the working toilet, then eat your pile of infinite shit to remove any sort of temptation to leave this pit


OPTION D update mailing address to pit; work from computer with internet access and have amazon deliveries dropped into your pit


OPTION E flush yourself down the working toilet


OPTION F use the computer with internet access to find porn, whack it, then go to sleep. big life decisions can not be made when horny or tired. reply to thread with what you decide tomorrow after really whacking it and sleeping for a solid eight hours.

OPTION G neglect the button and drink water from the toilet until you die of starvation


OPTION H use the computer with internet access to ask for help


OPTION I use the computer with internet access to buy a cell phone, then call for help


OPTION J a butt


Clockalope

Is there anything I can say that won't result in another banishment?
I'm here to finish the fight...

RobClock

While option F is clearly the correct course of action, I’m not one to neglect a butt option

PhantomCatClock

a wise choice would've been F then the butt option, but you made the most wise choice.

AbsintheClock

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ChocolateWaferClock

Quote from: Clockalope on May 16, 2019, 03:54:02 PM
Is there anything I can say that won't result in another banishment?

Ah, clockalope’s biannual comment. Such a spectacle.
Tell Dumpster that his mom found the stash.

VCRClock

you had me at "update mailing address"

:v .o( It's probably impossible to get out of this pit. Better not do anything about it. )
<Marlin Clock> This thread seems proof positive that divisiveness at any level is usually bad for the Clock Crew.
<PhantomCatClock> are we talking about the same clock crew

zl

i think climbing an enormous pile of tasty foods would be a rare pleasure, worthwhile regardless of utility

PhantomCatClock

I was going to be very disappointed if nobody picked A, B, C, E, or G. Thank you for saving this poll.

Slurpee

if you think about it, we all already live in a pit like this, called global capitalism, and the button is called


which is why I chose option E

FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK

how deep underground do you have to be to be out of US jurisdiction? this may affect my answer.

ChocolateWaferClock

Tell Dumpster that his mom found the stash.

PhantomCatClock

Quote from: FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK on May 25, 2019, 04:11:41 AM
how deep underground do you have to be to be out of US jurisdiction? this may affect my answer.

the pit is barely within that limit. Slurpee found a way to travel the extra foot underground, though