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hambster quiz

Farted by PhantomCatClock, August 18, 2020, 03:42:27 PM

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if you had a hammer, you would hammer

in the morning
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in the evening
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all over this land
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out a warning
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out love between your brothers and your sisters, ah-ah
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Total Members Voted: 13

PhantomCatClock

every other forum has a hamster quiz

RobClock


VCRClock

<Marlin Clock> This thread seems proof positive that divisiveness at any level is usually bad for the Clock Crew.
<PhantomCatClock> are we talking about the same clock crew

PhantomCatClock

rob you are the cc's best hambster look at all that hammering you did props bro

k9


pop-tart

Despite what you've heard about Yoko, Maxwell's Silver Hammer is pretty much killed the Beatles.

Slurpee

I remember I was hammering on a fence in the backyard when Dad approached. He was carrying a letter or something in his hand, and he looked worried.
I continued to hammer as he came toward me. "Son," he said, "why are you hammering on that fence? It already has plenty of nails in it."
"Oh, I'm not using nails," I replied. "I'm just hammering." With that, I returned to my hammering.
Dad asked me to stop hammering, as he had some news. I did stop hammering, but first I got a couple more hammers in, and this seemed to make Dad mad. "I said, stop hammering!" he yelled.
I think he felt bad for yelling at me, especially since it looked like he had bad news. "Look," he said, "you can hammer later, but first--"
Well, I didn't even wait to hear the rest. As soon as I heard "You can hammer," that's what I started doing. Hammering away, happy as an old hammer dog.
Dad tried to physically stop me from hammering by inserting a small log of some sort between my hammer and the fence. But I just kept on hammering, 'cause that's the way I am when I get that hammer going. Then, he just grabbed my arm and and made me stop.
"I'm afraid I have some news for you," he said.
I swear, what I did next was not hammering. I was just letting the hammer swing lazily at arm's length, and maybe it tapped the fence once or twice, but that's all. That apparently didn't make any difference whatsoever to Dad, because he just grabbed my hammer out of my hand and flung it across the field.
And when I saw my hammer flying helplessly through the air like that I just couldn't take it. I burst out crying, I admit it. And I ran to the house, as fast as my legs could take me.
"Son, come back!" yelled Dad. "What about your hammer?!"
But I could not have cared less about hammering at that point. I ran into the house and flung myself onto my bed, pounding the bed with my fists. I pounded and pounded, until finally, behind me, I heard a voice. "As long as you're pounding, why not use this?" I turned, and it was Dad, holding a brand-new solid-gold hammer.
I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes and ran to Dad's outstretched arms. But suddenly, he jumped out of the way, and I went sailing through the second-story window behind him.
Whenever I hear about a kid getting in trouble with the drugs, I like to tell him this story.

Slurpee


Slurpee


GreyClock

[u2]wT15gyi02v4[/u2]


Please watch this and post what's going on. Thank you. Then later I will translate/paraphrase. It might be fun.

PhantomCatClock

I am here for the position

Nah, that's next door

Hello, I am here for the position

Nope, one more door down

Hello, I am here for the position

Ah, finally. You're late. Get in. Here is a hammer, and the parts of the nail. Put the pointy side in and HAMBIT

ok

ugh these assholes made this nail with the pointy side on top. TOSS.

HEY WHY DID YOU TOSS THIS NAIL

the pointy side is on the top instead of the bottom. It won't go in.

So use it to hammer the ceiling, idiot




I did not understand the punchline because it was in some kind of language I've never heard before

RobClock

did more hamberstering

PhantomCatClock

you turned that shack into a house and you're turning that house into a home

GreyClock

Quote from: PhantomCatClock on August 19, 2020, 03:45:16 PM
I am here for the position

Nah, that's next door

Hello, I am here for the position

Nope, one more door down

Hello, I am here for the position

Ah, finally. You're late. Get in. Here is a hammer, and the parts of the nail. Put the pointy side in and HAMBIT

ok

ugh these assholes made this nail with the pointy side on top. TOSS.

HEY WHY DID YOU TOSS THIS NAIL

the pointy side is on the top instead of the bottom. It won't go in.

So use it to hammer the ceiling, idiot




I did not understand the punchline because it was in some kind of language I've never heard before
Pretty close. The stuff in the beginning is:


I am here for the position

I'm not here today, please come back tomorrow.

I am here for the position

Sorry, I made a mistake. I'm not here today either, please come back tomorrow.

I am here for the position

Beautiful, come on in, you can start right away... Let me show you how to do carpentry real quick.


It doesn't really translate, but the way he says it makes it sound like he'll teach him how to be a master carpenter in about five minutes. The middle part is pretty much correct.

The punchline is:


If you're here tomorrow at seven, you can start right away.

Okay, how much will you pay me?

2.50 per hour, but that'll increase later.

Okay, then I'll come in a bit later.




I WAS RIGHT, THIS IS FUN


PhantomCatClock