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Last night at the pub.

Farted by DWARFINATORclock, August 28, 2005, 09:08:34 AM

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PygmyClock

Quote from: DWARFINATORFunny, really funny man! Like I already said she looked, felt, smelled
and kissed like a woman. Not to forget she looked really good, fucking
great more like it. So I don't understand why you are mocking me.

Mate, you need too leave pirate alone man,
I mean, what has he ever done too you???
Not as if he smacked you side too side with
giant butterfly dung is it? Don't be so mean,
everyone has the right to show thier feelings.
[flash]http://img53.imageshack.us/img53/8288/cctv2os3.swf width=200 height=200[/flash]

 :)

RobZombieClock

if you slapped a girl in fact, u got fucked up. never got a chance by this hottie anyway. and it must be a joke. come on! which shemale is gojng to you, kiss ya cheek and then go: i used to be a man, ya know?
no shemale will ever say that. most times, u will find it out when you first gonna fuck them. but then, its already too late., so.

you slapped a girl *hehihihi*

DWARFINATORclock

Quote from: Trianglestory

I'm glad I'm not the only one with female horror stories.

Knowing how it feels to be deceived by a woman I say
never trust them, and don't buy in to their lies
or you will get screwed, like what happened to you.
Women, you can't live with 'em and you can't live without 'em.

I feel for you man, that must have been a really
terrifying experience, have you ever told your friends about it?
Sometimes that may help, plus you can plot some revenge : )

Cunts like that don't deserve to get laid man, you deserve
revenge, get her and her friends back for what they did
and let them know it was you. Shit in their mailbox!
ZING!
You'll feel better, trust me.

ShotglassClock

...
Now I see why you're on cc instead of outside.
Your cities are full of creeps.

o_O
"There\'s arousal all over the farm and these sluts embody it."

PygmyClock

Quote from: DWARFINATORI'm glad I'm not the only one with female horror stories.

Knowing how it feels to be deceived by a woman I say
never trust them, and don't buy in to their lies
or you will get screwed, like what happened to you.
Women, you can't live with 'em and you can't live without 'em.

I feel for you man, that must have been a really
terrifying experience, have you ever told your friends about it?
Sometimes that may help, plus you can plot some revenge : )

Cunts like that don't deserve to get laid man, you deserve
revenge, get her and her friends back for what they did
and let them know it was you. Shit in their mailbox!
ZING!
You'll feel better, trust me.

I wouldn't worry about it dwarfy I mean
theres nothing wrong with sleeping with a transvesite!
Heaven forbid, I've done it a few times too!
Oh by the way, their a bundle of fun too
ugly, but fun, especially at the end when they dont
go on for ages like woman dom oh well, life would be
heavinly if that where true. If your actually reading
this your really sad, go fuck yourself...sideways.

You disgust me all of you, your all so I'm a edgy teen, havn't
overviewed this thread and thought this is disgusting
unless you are attracted too transvestites of course
which in any case is all right as you dont have too worry
everyone about being gay n stuff. I'm gonna go on about my
rich and succesfull life story now, when I was born in new york
everyone praised me in such way, I used to get erections whilst
going too sleep, oh those were the days, no worry about life,
or money, or your family. Just sat there all day not doing an
inch of work. Excellent. When I was 14 I started too pick my bum
Not nice eh? oh well deal with it, it's not as if your actually
going too read this whole post its too long and now I can't be
twated to use  punctuation, grr thats another thing that annoys
over all is punctuation, who needs it? It's not as if we cre about it.
Over all I'm just going on as I'm bored. :D My favourite type of
breakfast is cereal, I like it with sugar and milk. Used with a
elongated spoon, it can be just the perfect thing too settle a bad
dilema, anyway who cares what I'm on about, TOO LONG DID
fuck all too try and read it, everyone wants too be like us,
understatement we are, we desrve more power and love
cool people get more than us and we defeated the oompaloompas
knifed them infact, so they couldn't meet there precious willy
erect wonker, Oh well i'm going too bed night all, nice too speak
Relackeringa too you all good night and dont let the bed bugs bite
[flash]http://img53.imageshack.us/img53/8288/cctv2os3.swf width=200 height=200[/flash]

 :)

RobZombieClock

my story: it was at a party (where else?)
not all were drunk, but tired. this girl (got a crush on her for like, 2 years?) and she was like, really...well, it looked like she got a crush oin me too. (like showing, grabbing and some other shit with her tits.) and when we all went to bed at the party (it was a lame one so we decided to do) she  announced to sleep with myself in one bed.
so it was night and she pretended all like "lets petting" and i rubbed her tits.
and the day after she was all like: oh my god. you touched my boobs! i was asleep!

damn whore. i was saying: no way, you were awake ! and she made the other girls (UGLY ONES, but the only girls left, one of them is a sister of a friend) hating me, not the worst thing. worst thing was that now, she makes things like calling me pervert, and sometimes, she s like lets hug, and then like, get the fuck out of my sight or i ll smack ya with my little needle, that i use to hurt myself!!
(she was split with her old bf, so i smelled my chance. 1 month later, or something less, they got back together.)

if someone can solve the riddle of femalness, please tell me

ShotglassClock

Quote from: NightClockif someone can solve the riddle of femalness, please tell me

Learn how to spell and type.
I know that would be a selling point for me.
"There\'s arousal all over the farm and these sluts embody it."

PygmyClock

Quote from: ShotglassClockLearn how to spell and type.
I know that would be a selling point for me.
LOL

Shotglass>Night

Sorry night, that was kinda funny.:D
[flash]http://img53.imageshack.us/img53/8288/cctv2os3.swf width=200 height=200[/flash]

 :)

ShotglassClock

Quote from: PygmyClockLOL

Shotglass>Night

Sorry night, that was kinda funny.:D

It's true!
I'm a stickler for that sort of thing.

Proper English..

[/orgasm]
"There\'s arousal all over the farm and these sluts embody it."

Tur-Mex

Well... it didn't happened to me but the story I'm going to tell next is the worst thing that can happen to someone. Ok, so there is this guy who goes to a whore as a first sexual experience. After the "experience" he had, he told his 2 closest friends so they go too.  I heared them talking stuff like "it was awesome" and "she had big boobs" and "she wasn't that pretty but she was a 7 out of 10". Anyways, years later one of these guys goes to her once again but this time he pulls "her" hair. She screams with the voice of a man and stabs him with a short knife "she" had in his leg. Later in court this guy learns that "her" name is not "Tina" but "Tony", and apparently "Tony" is a deserter (he didn't went to the army). Last time I heared of them they were visiting psychologists.

RobZombieClock

lol@ shotglass.
only if i am from austria and English isnt my First Language.



and the fact that i just invented another word for "feminity"



"youre prejudicing me"

DWARFINATORclock

Quote from: NightClocklol@ shotglass.
only if i am from austria and English isnt my First Language.

and the fact that i just invented another word for "feminity"


"youre prejudicing me"

You don't know what "prejudicing" means, right?

Hey, It doesn't matter where you are from,
everyone should be able to use grammar/spelling
like they aren't 5 yeas old, just saying random words
often makes you look stupid.

Today I asked some friends if they knew who she or
he was (the girl from my story), but still haven't had
any succes in finding someone who knows her, I had a
rad time doing stupid shit at school though (not).

But back to the subject, I asked around and they didn't
understand why I was asking about the girl, because
they knew I slapped her and everything, I guess she
told everyone about it, but didn't tell anyone why I
slapped her, atleast I think she didn't because I
haven't been laughed at or anything, maybe they thought she
earned it. I'm still trying to find stuff out, but nothing has
come up yet. I'm thinking that tomorrow I'll have more luck,
knowing that tomorrow I'll have classes again and
someone must something, right?

Sinister Clock

For goodness sakes people!
urine in this story is NON EXISTANT.
Coming to the bar was such a
kick in the balls

You really need to learn to switch your brians
on in the morning, so you can put your balls
up your arse and I won't even care

All you clocks out there just go and
lick your elbow... If you can.
Lies I am saying! except for lieing about lieing!

Tur-Mex

Quote from: Sir SinisterFor goodness sakes people!
urine in this story is NON EXISTANT.
Coming to the bar was such a
kick in the balls

You really need to learn to switch your brians
on in the morning, so you can put your balls
up your arse and I won't even care

All you clocks out there just go and
lick your elbow... If you can.
Lies I am saying! except for lieing about lieing!
how stupid can you be?
The thing that you don't realize is that stuff like this CAN happen. Welcome to the real world!
And why should he lie about somethig like this?
I wish you marry a travestite and learn who "she" really is when you go with her to the doctor to find out why can't you two have babies.

DWARFINATORclock

Quote from: Sir Sinisterurine!

Gee, I'm sorry that there was no  urine in the story, I have
other stories about urine though, for you I'll type one
out. One time I was at this party and everyone was getting
drunk, you can probably tell where this is going, but hey.

Just after I've arrived this girl started slapping me
on my ass. I thought what the fuck? So I said hey you
bitch what the fuck are you doing (she wasn't hot)?

Bitch said to me something along the lines of hey baby
undress and I'll give you a blowjob, I said sure and
took the offer, she had no idea, hahaha.

Things weren't going as she had planned, she started sucking
only to find out that I wouldn't get hard, I didn't
only have to piss, I also couldn't get my whiskeydick hard.

Ofcourse I did the obvious thing any drunk asshole would do,
bitch never saw it coming. I just let go of everything, my piss
vigorously spraying out of my dick into her mouth, cheeks blowing up.
I think I've never laughed this hard before in my life, I fell
over and pissed all over her, myself and the room we were in. you must
understand I was very drunk and you know, drunk people tend to do
stupid things, so yeah, that's one of my piss stories.

Tur-Mex

Quote from: DWARFINATORstory
Now THAT is top quality entretainment.

PirateClock

i once pissed a glass full and i guy drink it.
_pirate_butchcavities (20:29:15): FUCK CLOCKS _pirate_

DWARFINATORclock

Quote from: TriangleUrine? Where did you get urine from?

Sinister, I don't think you should be posting
until you have thought out what you want to say.
Create posts with substance! Not just random words like
"Kick in the balls"

Anyways, I think I understood what you were
trying to get across, but the words dont make much sense.

That story that Dwarfinator
had told us is not only possible, but
it actually happened! There are no lies in his
story, so try to be a little more sensitive to his problem.

There is truth in this post, even I thought it was
really weird. Sinister's post was quite chaotic and
unintelligible. Next time you should try to make it
easier to understand.

DWARFINATORclock

Quote from: TriangleHello, I am bumping this thread,
I don't have much to say though.

Really, that story I said earlier not
only partially true, I left out the real
ending. I really got with the hot chick, she
licked my balls. I was just being a friend.

So it wasn't a true horror story after all? Ball licking is
unbelievably hot, well that's what I think, I always ask the
pretties I'm with if they want to lick my balls, and they often will.

Anyway something weird happened again today, I think my
life is just a WTF magnet, alot of crazy shit happens to me
every day. Like when I got home there was a fucking
xylophone on the table, what the FUCK? I'll ask my mom about it later.

PygmyClock

Quote from: TriangleBy the way, It was hot she really
understood how to lick my balls.
Maybe I should call her back and
pump her again. It would be fun.

Oh, what a joke, you had your balls sucked
man, I know somone who  could do it better
fran her name is, untill I found out she was
grossly into bondage, then she gave me a
bar of metal, to make her uncomfortable with
apart from that she was cool, she had very big
nipples aswell, oh my days they were big!!
[flash]http://img53.imageshack.us/img53/8288/cctv2os3.swf width=200 height=200[/flash]

 :)