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Brief reviews of movies you saw recently

Farted by StrangeClock, October 13, 2005, 05:34:38 PM

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Roman Collar Clock

Quote from: StrangeClockah yes, I couldn't help but laugh when Aslan named Peter "Wolfsbane" just because the wolf JUMPED INTO HIS SWORD. Plus when he said "Peter... clean your sword" I mentally added "but do it off camera. Age ratings. You know how it is."

lol

In the book, Peter actually goes up to the wolf and kills it without holding his sword all the way out like a moron.  The part where he breaks up the river when they're attacked is also made up.
Quote from: Inquisitor on October 10, 2008, 07:10:33 PM
Whenever RomanCollar goes to 7-11 he gets a dick-flavored slurpee.

Losperman

Last Holiday - 7/10

Although this is your traditional "feel good" movie with morals and values and all that good stuff, I actually found it to be pretty good. Queen Latifah and LL Cool J both did well, and, as always, Alicia Witt was incredibly and undeniably hot. She looks like she's lost a little weight from her already thin frame, though. Still hot. I think I'm going to change this review to a review of how hot Alicia Witt was in the movie. Her rich, red hair remained the focal point... eh, I guess I'll just finish up about the movie. Several cheesy moments and a way too predictable ending is where I took the points away. Other than that, it was a pretty good "feel good" movie. And Alicia Witt was hot. Hot.
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Slurpee

Quote from: LospermanLast Holiday - 7/10

way too predictable ending is where I took the points away.
That movie... as soon as I saw the preview, I turned to my friend and said "that can't have a happy ending."

She's dying, so she borrows a bunch of money and goes on vacation.
She's either going to die or be past her head in debt.

Tell me they didn't fuck this up somehow.

Losperman

Quote from: slurpeeThat movie... as soon as I saw the preview, I turned to my friend and said "that can't have a happy ending."

She's dying, so she borrows a bunch of money and goes on vacation.
She's either going to die or be past her head in debt.

Tell me they didn't fuck this up somehow.

**Spoilers** Well, I wasn't sure if I should put a spoiler alert on a movie no one on this board will probably see, but I didn't want to take the chance. She doesn't borrow money, she cashes in her entire IRA and all of the US bonds her mother left her. And then when she's spending it all she wins like $100,000 gambling, only to later find out she's not dying. And she gets the man of her dreams. And her dream job. And meets her idols. So yeah, it's one of those super happy ending movies.
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Losperman

Mission Impossible III - 9/10

A great action movie. Good acting throughout, with Philip Seymour Hoffman playing one of the best villains in recent memory. The action is nice and crispy, with only one or two WTF moments. The twist was a little predictable, but still provided enough guessing throughout. Overall, better than the second, and... I'm not sure where I'd place it with the first movie yet. I think the first movie was better, but I'd have to see this one again to be sure.
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Slurpee

Quote from: Losperman**Spoilers** Well, I wasn't sure if I should put a spoiler alert on a movie no one on this board will probably see, but I didn't want to take the chance. She doesn't borrow money, she cashes in her entire IRA and all of the US bonds her mother left her. And then when she's spending it all she wins like $100,000 gambling, only to later find out she's not dying. And she gets the man of her dreams. And her dream job. And meets her idols. So yeah, it's one of those super happy ending movies.
Jesus Christ that's a feel good movie.

Mask

Swingers 8/10

I had been meaning to see this for awhile and finally picked it up at the video store on saturday. the casing read "Tarantino meets Seinfeld" and thats an incredibly good analogy of the film, a series of somewhat connected events involving dialogue about inane subjects. But just like seinfeld and tarantino films it really pulls it off. Vince Vaughn's character starts off really annoying but really grows on you over time. The intro was pretty badly put together and there were some really noticible technical goofs (boom mikes, important props dissapearing) but the rest of the film makes up for those.

StrangeClock

Irreversible
Borrowed it from a guy in my film course, and I'm not sure what to think. On one hand its story is fairly uninteresting, and at times the director has made the movie deliberately hard if not impossible to watch (during the first screening, the movie's first half hour contained a background audio noise that evokes nausea and vertigo in some people), which seems to me like focusing on audience reaction beyond any other point of your movie. On the other hand its style is wildly inspiring, with single takes that go on for minutes and bizarre twisting camerawork. The idea of a story unfolding backwards by playing scenes in a reverse order is not new, but as it appears to be limited to six or seven scenes in this movie, it still works.

My first impression of it was kind of like a cinematic cousin of dada - shaking up and irritating the medium by deliberately going against what is expected. It fascinated me in technique, but beyond that I don't think it's a good movie. It does hold points as the first movie I've ever seriously considered turning off at some point because it got too strong for me, though I kept watching - the 'fire extinguisher' scene. I doubt the DVD involved the nauseating background noise that was played at its first screening, but just the culmination of the drunken camerawork, the throbbing, warbling background music, the rancid gay sex going on all round, and then the violence just going on and on. Woo.


Land of the Dead
DENNIS HOPPER SAID THE Z-WORD. :( Has its charm from time to time, some fun feeds (chewing off a bellybutton piercing, lolol), but waaay too much emphasis on the story of the humans and all their characters versus not enough zombie focus, plus I don't care at all for intelligent zombies. Their mindlessness is what adds to their freakiness, just like their slowness. ness. Distracting them with fireworks? And that works everytime? Pfft. No sir. On the plus side, Asia Argento is unspeakably hot. All women should come with a tattoo like hers.


A Sound of Thunder
Not that it came as a surprise, but what a poor, boring, technically inferior in every way, illogical, formulaic piece of dreck. The fact that it's about time travel doesn't help, but I've rarely been so consistently aware of inconsistencies while watching a movie, yet at the same time it's too dull to care much. It's probably one of the overall worst movies I've ever seen.
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LeekClock

grr MI:3            2/5

I posted my thoughts in the MI3 thread, but here they are again for the record!
 
 
 
 
 
 
Let me first voice my opinion in grunt form, for those of you who cannot read long passages of text: UGHHHHHHH. UGH.
 
Now for everyone else:
 
Hoffman was good..
 
OK FINISHED WITH THE COMPLIMENTS, NOW ABOUT THE REST:
 
Ok, so at this stage of the film "series" we know as mission impossible, there are certain unavoidable factors which one can expect. Firstly, Masks. Lots of masks. It's like the fucking Scooby-Doo Mysteries. When you go into this movie, just take it for granted that everyone is probably someone else wearing a mask, and that all the good people are bad and the bad people are good.
 
The story started off quite acceptably. I didn't have high expectations. But I was satisfied. Then the writer went for a drink and got his 15 year old son to finish the script whilst he snorted coke off a stripper's tits. It devolved into an amalgam of all the quirks of the past two movies, and by the end of the film they were resorting to a great deal of cheap ploys in order to surprise viewers... to the point where it degraded whatever credibility the movie had.
 
Then throw in a ridiculous attempt to be current and intellectual by mirroring the recent political history in America, in such a blatant way as to make me scoff out loud (yeah i scoffed!).
 
But of course, the only reason you go to see a film like this is for the action, and that was very good. So with that considered, I recommend it. But don't go looking for a particularly engaging story or buckets of originality.
 
 

PirateClock

Quote from: chocolatechipclockSnatch - 7/10

Direction and editing were brilliant, but I felt that the writing wasn't too good.  It was cool visual candy, but the plot didn't really appeal to me.  Not a bad film, though.
your kidding me right, snatch was a great movie.
_pirate_butchcavities (20:29:15): FUCK CLOCKS _pirate_

LeekClock

Quote from: PirateClockyour kidding me right, snatch was a great movie.

7/10 is a generous review. Especially for that movie, which doesn't offer more than its predecessor: Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels.

StrangeClock

Saw II
It's good, but lacks the punch of the first one. Like someone else said, it reminded me of Cube (which is not one of my favorites). The plot was not as solid. The whole montage at the end seemed overkill, halfway through I was like "yeah, I get it, he was in the safe all along etcetera etcetera". There's probably no way to avoid it, but I felt Jigsaw lost too much mystery with this one. Lastly, the neck cutting scene was like the sequel to the leg cutting scene and lacked its shock element, probably in part because it happens to a bad guy instead of a good guy.

I feel like they honestly used elements from the first one more to 'mirror' them than out of lack of creativity, but still it ended up more conventional. If they're going to make a third, I hope they reach back more to the minimalist situation of the first one, two or maybe three people, and very few scenes outside the actual trap room.
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Losperman

Nanny McPhee - 7/10

Not my kind of movie, but I try and rate them for what they are rather than what they're not. So, for a kids movie that borrowed heavily from the central plot of Mary Poppins, this was a pretty good movie. The acting was only so-so, with a few instances of over-acting, but for a kids movie I guess it's understandable. Emma Thompson and Colin Firth were both great, though. And Angela Lansbury played her role well. There were a few funny parts, and they actually did a pretty good job of avoiding the "baby talk" that a lot of kids movies use to help drag the smaller humans of a lesser IQ through the plot.
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AvocadoClock

Walk the Line 3/5

I just couldn't see its greatness. It had sex, drugs, and rock n' roll, but it didn't have enough of any of it. The drugs were minor, and the sex was off screen, and the rock n' roll was half country. I know that a lot of other people enjoyed the movie, but I needed something more to enjoy it. I felt like there wasn't enough driving the plot... wait, what was the plot?

Arctic

Quote from: AvocadoClockWalk the Line 3/5

I just couldn't see its greatness. It had sex, drugs, and rock n' roll, but it didn't have enough of any of it. The drugs were minor, and the sex was off screen, and the rock n' roll was half country. I know that a lot of other people enjoyed the movie, but I needed something more to enjoy it. I felt like there wasn't enough driving the plot... wait, what was the plot?

Speaking of music films... I recently watched these again:

The Doors - 8/10
Ok, the movie, probably tempted me to take acid. Besides that, it gave an entertaining tale and kept me interested the whole film.  Wasn't amazing though.

Almost Famous - 9/10
Even if they didn't stress drugs or sex enoug in my opinion, this movie is just entertaining, fucking period.  They developed the kid's character exceptionally well.  I don't think I liked the ending too much though.

I also went on a Kevin Smith binge:

Clerks - 8/10
I always liked this one, but a lot of the actors were just plain out fucking horrible.  Maybe because it was New Jersey.  This movie sets up a lot of the connecting material used in Smith's other movies as well. (i.e. Jay and Silent Bob, the girl who died in mid backtroke at the YMCA gym, the girl who fucked a dead guy, the quick stop store, etc..)

Mallrats - 10/10
Absolutely my favorite of all of his films.  Fucking love the multiple storylines and characters.

Chasing Amy - 9/10
Intro to the Bluntman comics.  I enjoy this story a lot, but I fucking hated the end.

Dogma - 7/10
This one is a stretch from the previous movies.  I still enjoyed it.

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back - 9/10
This pulls all the other movies into one massive jizz of a comedy movie.  Funny shit.

Jersey Girl - 8/10
Ok, first off, the best thing about this movie is the fact that Jennifer Lopez's character dies within the first ten minutes.  The little girl has an almost addicting charm and liv tyler is hot.  I sadly enjoyed this movie.

AdrenalineClock

I think Kevin Smith is a mediocre director at best, but he has an amazing ear for dialogue.

StrangeClock

Quote from: StrawpegarrotClockChasing Amy - 9/10
Intro to the Bluntman comics.  I enjoy this story a lot, but I fucking hated the end.

Amen. It was like he had a fairly mature story going down about a guy who was too uptight to forget his girlfriend's past, and then he suddenly fucks it up completely by having the main character suggest a threesome as the solution to all their problems. I don't know whether Kevin Smith just has a fucked up concept of relationships or wanted to be controversial.
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chocolatechipclock

Mallrats - 9/10

Great comedy!

Kevin Smith writes brilliant dialouge.  However, some of the acting was a bit ridiculous.  Otherwise, it's hilarious stuff and definently worth the watch.

Losperman

Poseidon - 6.5/10

I don't see what all of the bad reviews are about. Well, I guess I do, but what do the critics expect from from a remake of a campy movie? Although most of the action happens in the last half of the movie, I liked the first half much better. They got things going pretty well with the characters, but they never really developed them like they should have. Especially Richard Dreyfuss. He and his character seem like wasted potential. Also, one thing I liked about the original was missing in this one: the splitting up of the group. But most of the acting was decent and the special effects were great. If they only continued with the characters rather than snowball the cheesy action bits in the last half this would have been a great movie.

Napoleon Dynamite - 8.5/10

I will refrain from using any of his trademark expressions of joy to describe this movie, but I really liked it. I laughed hysterically at a couple of parts, but I found myself at least chuckling through the entire movie, which is what makes it better than a lot of comedies out today. I wouldn't say it's one of the funniest movies I've seen, but it's enjoyable to the point of being able to watch it several times in a month and not getting sick of it.
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MapClock

Animal House 9/10
I know its old :/ But i stll think it was a hilarious movie. I lauged almost constantly.
Yup