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Farted by Losperman, November 01, 2005, 01:26:35 AM

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GreyClock

You starting a militia? Never mind fire pit, that's quite the compound.



I figured fire pit ment something like a sunken terrace with pallets lining the wall.

GreyClock

Just took a big diarrhea shit listening to Enya. Orinoco Flow.

VCRClock

#111422
Quote from: GreyClock on June 08, 2019, 03:36:28 PM
Just took a big diarrhea shit listening to Enya. Orinoco Flow.

:eek:

ok next shit I take I'ma blast "only time"
<Marlin Clock> This thread seems proof positive that divisiveness at any level is usually bad for the Clock Crew.
<PhantomCatClock> are we talking about the same clock crew

Marlin Clock

Quote from: GreyClock on June 08, 2019, 02:36:18 AM
You starting a militia? Never mind fire pit, that's quite the compound.



I figured fire pit ment something like a sunken terrace with pallets lining the wall.
It does give off a bit of a homeless camp vibe.

VCRClock

#111424
u c⃠ me
<Marlin Clock> This thread seems proof positive that divisiveness at any level is usually bad for the Clock Crew.
<PhantomCatClock> are we talking about the same clock crew

VCRClock

FUCK YOU SMF LET ME POST TRUMPET EMOJI
<Marlin Clock> This thread seems proof positive that divisiveness at any level is usually bad for the Clock Crew.
<PhantomCatClock> are we talking about the same clock crew

RobClock

Quote from: GreyClock on June 08, 2019, 02:36:18 AM
You starting a militia? Never mind fire pit, that's quite the compound.



I figured fire pit ment something like a sunken terrace with pallets lining the wall.

It’s much more atmospheric during the evening with the string of lights plugged in (extension cord running from the house across the road). I finished fixing it up and took some more pictures, I’ll share them when I get a minute to sit down at my desk since imgur won’t let you upload from your phone without the app anymore.

RobClock

[u2]14ZD9_tLwgA[/u2]

[u2]tsD4im7K3wg[/u2]


unrelated, here's the compound all cleaned up https://imgur.com/a/e4Q3JH0

GreyClock

Why are new (mobile) games always so goddamn slow? The jump animations look like Keen (sorry Commandress Keenette) is floating on a balloon. The old games were always JUMP ZAP ZAP JUMP POGO ZAP JUMP. At least in my memory of them. Maybe time is slowing down.

Slurpee

I'm back, motherfuckers, and I'm here to say,


a cool thing about playing cheap indie games from itch.io is that since almost nobody plays them there aren't walkthroughs or faqs so you can't ruin them for yourself even if you want to.*
(yeah that's right, not even an attempt at a segue)

I was playing Power Drill Massacre


this game has the scariest jumpscares I have ever seen. that probably sounds like damning with faint praise but, speaking as somebody who thinks 5 nights at freddy's is a stupid piece of shit, these are A+ jumpscares. the noise is SO LOUD and SO HORRIFYING, and they don't quite come out of nowhere, there's like a one-and-a-half second long ramp-up, which is exactly enough time for you to not quite be able to brace yourself, so the oh shit reaction just gets streeetched and it's so stressful and yeah. it's not immediately obvious what's happening, where it's coming from, why it's happening, what you can do to avoid it, etc., so the tension is super thick. there was a point where it literally felt like my heart was pumping one long painful beat as, on instinct, I contorted the awful tank controls to get my character in position to sprint down a blind hallway until the noise stopped
the game (and afaik all of the games by the same developer, a one-man studio called Puppet Combo) is a weird mash-up of ps1-inspired game design with vhs and 80's schlock aesthetics. somewhat anachronistic, but the grimy exploitation/horror theming couples really well with the unfriendly controls and uncanny presentation of early 3d. it feels hostile

anyway, given the aforementioned lack of resources, I found myself doing something I haven't done since I was a kid: hand-drawing my own maps =)
(spoiler)

(by the time I started drawing the second map I'd found where I put my whiteout roller thingies after the move)
something very pure about the experience- counting paces, making corrections when I realize things line up differently than I thought, trepidation becoming curiosity becoming understanding becoming mastery

*Power Drill Massacre (and Puppet Combo's catalogue in generally) is actually on the lower end of obscurity, and there are walkthroughs and tips floating around out there, but they're vague and not very informative. I may seem to be in a position to help, but these maps are going to remain forever incomplete because I had a lucky run and finished the game while mapping out the basement, and also I am not going into the sugar tunnel it's scary as hell


that comander keen game looks like ass. I was completely willing to give it a shot before I watched the video (boy and his blob wii was so nice it permanently skewed my willingness to give quaint, twee remakes a chance to prove love or spark joy), but it's just another ass throwaway mobile game cash-in. if you're not going to treat an old franchise with love, why even bother? commander keen only has brand recognition for people who aren't going to want this. so weird!
kind of glad I'm the only person in the world who gives a shit about Monster Bash. knock on wood

Slurpee


GreyClock

Quote from: Slurpee on June 10, 2019, 02:20:54 AM
I'm back, motherfuckers, and I'm here to say,
Christ has risen.

Quote from: Slurpee on June 10, 2019, 02:20:54 AMthat comander keen game looks like ass. I was completely willing to give it a shot before I watched the video (boy and his blob wii was so nice it permanently skewed my willingness to give quaint, twee remakes a chance to prove love or spark joy), but it's just another ass throwaway mobile game cash-in. if you're not going to treat an old franchise with love, why even bother? commander keen only has brand recognition for people who aren't going to want this. so weird!
kind of glad I'm the only person in the world who gives a shit about Monster Bash. knock on wood
Coincidentally, I came across this video just now that's like the complete opposite, two passionate guys etc.

[u2]7XnNndec12s[/u2]

It could still be shit, but uuuuuh I maybe want to risk finding out.

FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK

I skimmed about a minute or two of e3 footage and that was enough of that. why cant they just do the nintendo direct thing "hey here's some games *games* thanks for watching". instead everything has to be material for a future crowbcat video.

Quote from: Slurpee on June 10, 2019, 02:20:54 AMcommander keen only has brand recognition for people who aren't going to want this. so weird!
I don't think the people who make these decisions even play video games.

Quote from: Slurpee on June 10, 2019, 02:20:54 AMI was playing Power Drill Massacre

oh hey someone is actually making old time tank control exploration focused horror games neat.  I saw one recently on steam and switch aping resident evil but apparently it sucks. good to know there's other options.

though I could also finally get around to playing dino crisis or illbleed. too many games adsfasdfasdf. but instead I think I'm gonna play Gato Roboto or Nier Automata next. The first one is a kitty metroid game. earthworm jim except you're a cat and it's metroid not run and gun and launch cows. meowtroid! the pixel art is super charming.

PhantomCatClock

Quote from: Slurpee on June 10, 2019, 02:20:54 AM
if you're not going to treat an old franchise with love, why even bother? commander keen only has brand recognition for people who aren't going to want this. so weird!

While it's hardly the same size of a generation gap, be careful what you underestimate. I was thinking about Spyro a while ago and looked up what they did with him--Skylanders. Spyro is now Skylanders. Frothing seven year olds now love his series, where he isn't even sort of the main character, and people over the age of 16 will never be interested in another game they make for him.



Not to speak evil on Commander Keen but there is a very real chance he is dead and never coming back and you'll have to watch middle schoolers talking about the new Space Casper game series and see all the McDonald's toys and they'll change Keen's name and it'll be a moba

PhantomCatClock

What happened to Nintendo where they not only listen to fans, now, but they listen to fans more than any reasonable person would expect

FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK


Slurpee

Quote from: PhantomCatClock on June 11, 2019, 12:26:30 PM
What happened to Nintendo where they not only listen to fans, now, but they listen to fans more than any reasonable person would expect
I was trying to find a webcomic to post in response to this but I think it's gone forever

it was from when the Wii came out and kept selling out at all the stores, and nintendo kept responding to questions about shortages with bizarre unhelpful nonsense answers

and the comic was, the girl from the comic talking to Reggie Fils-Aime, and she says something like "Hey, Reggie, you said you were going to address the Wii manufacturing shortages last December, but it's already July, and people still can't find them in stores! What gives?"
and Reggie responds, "There's no such thing as a Wii!"
and then the last panel is him and Iwata smiling at each other and winking

it was such a perfect, understated joke about Nintendo's incredibly strange behavior as a company, and specifically their apparent unwillingness to... allow people to buy their products? :confused:

they did the exact same thing with Amiibos and the NES/SNES Classics a few years later and I thought back to that comic and smiled

anyway, pretend I posted that comic instead of this post describing it, please, thank you.

RobClock

Quote from: Slurpee on June 10, 2019, 02:20:54 AM
I'm back, motherfuckers, and I'm here to say,

Don’t ever leave us again bb ilu

RobClock

I’m still really upset about Commander Keen

FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK

I’m still really upset about Goemon especially since the assets for the pachinko game could have made an excellent modern goemon game AAAAAAAAAGH