Quote from: Slurpee on March 17, 2020, 12:30:12 PMhe's capable of interspecies telepathy. how does he think nothing of this?
the entire movie should have turned on a dime right there. forget reading women's minds, you are a verifiable dog psychic. first of all, go tell james randi and get a million dollars. then go down in history as the man who completely revolutionized our understanding of how the mind works! you could prove wittgenstein wrong!

He would only be capable of reading female dog's minds though, which would limit him to roughly a 50% success rate. But is it only dogs? What would happen if he took a walk through the zoo?

I vote for Mayor BootyButtCheeks!

Quote from: Thor on February 10, 2020, 08:14:25 PM
To actually upload stuff, you go to newgrounds, and click the downward arrow button on the top right and select that you want to upload an animation. Once you edit the form at all it creates a "project" on your account that you can edit at any time.

Then sit and wait a week for your shit to pass judgement since nobody is around to vote anymore.

Lol

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Quote from: FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK on January 27, 2020, 11:54:18 AM
looks like the translator for the snes goemon games, who has fan translated over 50 games till now, got chased off the internet and out of translating games entirely because there was exactly one "problematic" word in the translation that was pretty much a direct translation.

What was the word?

Quote from: PatriotClock on January 27, 2020, 12:27:20 AM
RIP kobe

Helicopter crash seems like an awesome way to die. I dunno what everyone is complaining about.

Daddy life

Merry Christbutt!

jewsjewsjews
jewsjewsjews
grab an alligator dick

Now we beg to be de-modded.

Quote from: RobClock on December 17, 2019, 09:46:13 AMI am coming on 25 years old and the pool to draw from becomes increasingly smaller

Dude, you've got plenty of time. I didn't even meet my wife until I was 32. Enjoy the freedom of your youth.

Quote from: GreyClock on December 13, 2019, 08:30:56 PMShe has four kids

Run away! Jesus...

Quote from: RobClock on December 10, 2019, 10:45:19 AM
Remember Ghostbusters: The Video Game from like 10 years ago?

I remember playing Ghostbusters on NES as a kid. It was a total garbage game but I was all about anything Ghostbusters at the time.

Quote from: WaferClock on December 04, 2019, 01:50:14 AM
I could end up maybe, just maybe, having an MRI on Christmas.

Well I hope the doctor at least dresses up as Santa Claus.

Aww man. You know of a good tattoo removal place?

Quote from: RobClock on November 14, 2019, 02:46:53 PM
Happy birthday renegade {{{}}}

Thanks dude. Is 40 too old for Clock Crews?

Well let me preface by saying I'm not a stock market guru. I've only been dabbling in it for about 2 years now, and there's plenty I still don't know.

Quote from: GreyClock on November 08, 2019, 06:43:06 AM
One man's high is another man's low?

If someone is buying a stock while it's on the rise then the buyer knows that the stock isn't at its lowest, but sees potential for more growth and wants to get in on it before the momentum is gone.

QuoteAlso with all the shit that came out during the mortgage crisis, I assume the big banks have some sort of labyrinthine system in place to influence it to some degree. Like the British guy from the movie Wall Street who at one point "carries" the stock by creating fake demand. Like you have a shit-load of one stock that isn't doing so well. If you have a big enough budget you could theoretically create more demand by buying even more. Then when others take notice and try to get a piece of the action, you dump all your stock. Then these people who are not you (or your particular company) are left holding the bag. Hot potato!

If you've got a ton of money then you could definitely use it to sway a stock price one way or another to a certain degree. Who knows what is going on at the big banks? All sorts of fuckery I would imagine. What you're describing is a pump and dump: Creating fake interest in a stock to raise the price and then get rid of it.

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2) if the stocks are low why would you sell them? like why would that even be bad? just don't sell them when they're low...
The expectation that they might go even lower? The expectation that a company might go bust? Having them off the books (say at the end of a fiscal year)? If you're an active trader, taking the loss to free up the money and reinvest in stock that will prove profitable?

Yes to all of this. There are times when it makes sense to cut your losses.

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If you're Joe Public with twenty stocks in the company you work at, it doesn't make sense to sell low. If you're Jeff Wall Street with a sizeable portfolio I assume it's all about min-maxing and net profit. Like bet small, but win big (or lose small). Like stock A (buy: 40 sell: 30) and stock B (buy: 10 sell: 30), at the end of the day you're up 10. You're a genius, good job! I read the win rate once of these top Wall Street guys, like percentagewise, and it was surprisingly low. I also remember watching a program where a broker went up against some sort of randomized system and both of them broke about even.

Right. Different people will have different investment strategies, and sometimes serious investors will do things that seem counter-intuitive to Joe Publics as part of their strategy.

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3) how is it money? I'm pretty sure it's not.

It's similar to money in the sense that it's something that only has value because enough people agree to it having value (sort of). If your stock goes down in value, you're not actually losing money, it's just a virtual loss. It's only when you sell low, that it becomes a real loss. And instead of money and its underlying gold standard, it's tiny parts of companies and motherfucking dividend.

Right, it's not money, it's value.

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4) did I hear right that stocks become more valuable the more people want them? how does that even make sense? you SELL HIGH, why wouldn't they stop being wanted as much when their price goes up? and then you'd want the other stocks that are low because no one wants them. basically how is every single stock not the same price?

Basic supply and demand? Is it any more silly than paying a million dollars for a baseball card or a particular comic book? Another movie I saw about stocks was called Forrest Gump. In it there's something about him investing in "some apple company" early. Imagine a tiny percentage of the profit of every iPhone sold going directly into your pocket. You don't even have to do anything, just sit on your fat, decadent ass. That's pretty appealing.

If the price gets too high the demand will eventually dry up. Often when there's a lot of hype around a company the stock will shoot up too high (overvaluation) and investors will be like "Wait, what the fuck are we doing? This is crazy man", and then they start selling it off and the price will drop (price correction). 

QuoteI'll tell you one thing. The weirdest part for me is those dudes yelling at each other in the place. You have this massive global network and here are these fuckers running around, yelling, throwing bits of paper all over the place and working up to a coronary. I don't know how accurate that still is, because it's so fucking ineffective. In the movie Wall Street one of the brokers has to call one of those guys on the floor. He then has to run up to some other guy. Yell over other people to hope to get the sale? And the guy yells like "BLUE STAR" and the other guy yells "THIRTY" and the other guy yells "TWENTY FIVE" and a whole bunch of people yell "SOLD", who's keeping track? I mean, really. Best fill in your little tickets as honestly as possible or whatever.

Here endeth the lesson.

That classic scene we all know of people running over each other on the trading floor like it was Black Friday is mostly a thing of the past. Just about everything is done on computers now. I don't know what those dudes are still doing out there.

Quote from: Slurpee on November 07, 2019, 10:46:26 PM
things I a 30 year old man do not understand about the stock market:
1) if everybody knows to buy low and sell high, who are you buying from and selling to? just some absolute moron who does the opposite for no reason?

The majority of stocks aren't bought and sold between individuals. They are done through Market Makers which are essentially big warehouses full of stocks, which you buy or sell to. They are controlled by algorithms that set a willing buy and sell price for that moment, based on the amount of risk the MM determines the stock has. When you trade a stock you can do a Market Buy/Sell which is at what ever the current MM price is, or set or own price hoping that someone will eventually pick it up.

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2) if the stocks are low why would you sell them? like why would that even be bad? just don't sell them when they're low...

People freak out when they lose their money, and if they feel like that stock is not going to make a comeback will try and dump it on the market. The key to trading is keeping your emotions in check. But again, Market Makers control a lot of it, so if the MM is trying to sell at $1 and 5 minutes goes by without a sale the MM might say "Shit, maybe I need to sweeten this deal" and lower it to $0.99. If still no-one is buying the pattern continues until the MM gets it's price into the target range of what investors are willing to pay for it.

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3) how is it money? I'm pretty sure it's not. like how are you losing anything when stocks go down in value? you lost the money when you exchanged it for stocks. I lost money when I exchanged it for a copy of clayfihter sculptor's cut, and clayfight scultpror's cut went up in value. if it suddenly goes down in value, I haven't lost anything, I still have a game cartridge I never play. what's the difference between that and this except that stocks are made up and you couldn't put them into a nintendo 64 even if you wanted to

Like GreyClock said you only lose money when you decide to sell at a loss. Sometimes you can weather the storm and wait for the stock price to go back up, but if the company tanks, and you bought too high there may be no chance for recovery. This happens more often if you're trading OTC or penny stocks.

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4) did I hear right that stocks become more valuable the more people want them? how does that even make sense? you SELL HIGH, why wouldn't they stop being wanted as much when their price goes up? and then you'd want the other stocks that are low because no one wants them. basically how is every single stock not the same price?

That want is driven by investor confidence in a company. If investors see that a company is performing well they'll continue to drive the price up. If a stock price is going up that could be a sign of better things to come and you want to get in on this deal, commonly known as FOMO. And you don't want to buy any stock just because it's low. There's probably a reason that it's low and it might not be worth buying.

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5) everything. everything man idk wtf is the stock market? how is it a thing? it seems so stupid and pointless and confusing and those dudes yelling at each other in the place and that why is there a market? what lunatic decided people should be able to play pretend buying something that's not real, and it somehow became the most lucrative enterprise in human history like what the fuck is even happening why do we all act like this is normal? is it one of those things that was actually completely insane at first but eventually everybody who remembered the time before it existed died off, like cars, or did everybody just immediately start pretending it was normal for no reason, like the department of homeland security?

Um... yes.

Quote from: PhantomCatClock on October 29, 2019, 04:41:12 PM
i joined a coven just to pork a lady with a wolf tattoo but i left because the leader was a dickhead and they were pretty cringy

Invite her to your all-new coven. Now with less cringe and free pizza!