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[Slurpee]

oh yeah
he has that like Justin Bieber/George Michael thing of like a smooth, sculpted face where the cheeks are somehow a perfectly flat surface, with dark eyebrows in a high dramatic arc, and like... perfectly manicured, evenly distributed facial hair that's somehow all the exact same length and facing the same direction and ending at a perfect straight line? or the Saudi guy that was deported for being "too handsome"

I never understood why people found this attractive. it's like they're so pretty it doesn't even qualify as pretty anymore
it's like when you're making a human the prettiness slider maxes out at like 80, and somebody modded out the bounds check and set these guys to 255

they look human in the same way that marzipan carved into the shape of a fruit looks like fruit


also kind of ties in to what zl was saying
like, he's a "street rat" who steals to live, why he look like that

[PhantomCatClock]

it's so dull and shitty that aladdin instinctively rubs it to get a little shine going

it's the low-hanging fruit of the whole story's theme of true value versus surface appearance, and now they've cocked it up. I don't even like the animated aladdin and I'm offended

he's not even wearing the ring in this scene omg are they going to fuck up the cartoon too

[RenegadeClock]

Thye're replacing Robin Williams with Will Smith? This is horseshit!

[Slurpee]

Thye're replacing Robin Williams with Will Smith? This is horseshit!

he should be replaced with Dan Castellaneta

[FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK]

as long as we're shitting on disney, wreck it ralph is insanely overrated. I didn't hate it but I felt like the least excited person coming out of the theater. Everybody I talked to about it loved it so damn much when it came out. it felt like one of those things where a studio tries to make their own disney movie and follows the formula as close as they can, but it just ends up being forgettable for that same reason, if technically competent. like a troll in central park. then they slapped some video game characters on it for marketing. the sequel is coming out next month and it looks like a board room designed it. it's gonna make bank though because memes and princesses.

Thye're replacing Robin Williams with Will Smith? This is horseshit!

there's probably no one they could choose who wouldn't get a response of "who the hell is this" or "utter fucking heresy" no matter who it is. still, I'm disappointed. And I actually want to see him do a purely comedic role again. he might be the best part of the remake, perhaps the only redeeming part. or just shit on robin williams legacy. one or the other I think.

it's like they're so pretty it doesn't even qualify as pretty anymore
it's like when you're making a human the prettiness slider maxes out at like 80, and somebody modded out the bounds check and set these guys to 255[/i]

it's that amalgamated fashion model look. the female equivalent is weirdly similar. makes people look like aliens. I kinda respect the devotion to some form of physical perfection in some cases but it doesn't work for me either. the most attractive people you will ever meet are just random people you met in life.

[Slurpee]

I keep thinking about that time the south park guys got nominated for an oscar and they were going to have a live performance of "blame canada"
but then Mary Kay Bergman killed herself
and I guess Trey Parker didn't want to do it
so they had to find somebody to replace an entire cartoon ensemble live on stage
and in swooped Robin Williams, who did an outstanding job

and I think of "Little Monsters" where howie mandel is trying to do the same kind of "manic, fun friend" shtick as the genie and just horribly failing and it's hard to really point out exactly what he's doing wrong. he talks fast, cracks jokes, bounces around, but it's all fairly fucking dreadful
and Robin Williams could, obviously, do that shit while actually being funny and entertaining, but not only that, he could also on short notice stand in for an entire cartoon basically by himself

so they need somebody to play the live action version of the cartoon version of a man who was basically already a cartoon and it's just like how

Will Smith is a fine choice
he is a very likable man
it's been a long time since he was that Will Smith; he is older and makes weird choices and practices some kind of made-up math religion with his imbecile son
but if you need somebody who america loves and can act all crazy-go-nuts in a charming way, it's basically him, Jack Black or Jim Carrey (or Nic Cage, but only for the subset of the audience that is correct and has excellent opinions about things)
Jim Carrey has gone bye bye, so he's out
and I'm a Jack Black apologist but you already know everything he would bring to the role just from thinking about it for a couple seconds
so yeah let's see what Will Smith does with it
(and by "see" I of course mean "probably never actually get around to seeing")

[Slurpee]

also yeah Wreck-It Ralph was... alright

[Slurpee]

does anybody else, when you try to picture the character Wreck-It Ralph in your head, always picture Coach McGuirk instead?

[RobClock]

as long as we're shitting on disney, wreck it ralph is insanely overrated. I didn't hate it but I felt like the least excited person coming out of the theater. Everybody I talked to about it loved it so damn much when it came out. it felt like one of those things where a studio tries to make their own disney movie and follows the formula as close as they can, but it just ends up being forgettable for that same reason, if technically competent. like a troll in central park. then they slapped some video game characters on it for marketing. the sequel is coming out next month and it looks like a board room designed it. it's gonna make bank though because memes and princesses.

I agree, except I hate it. Wreck It Ralph is a paint by numbers, lifeless, utterly pedestrian, creatively bankrupt cash grab. It's so transparent in its pandering, with such a painfully generic and formulaic story, If Wreck It Ralph were a colour it would be a mixture between beige and grey. With a layer of dust on it.

[PhantomCatClock]

If Wreck It Ralph were a colour it would be a mixture between beige and grey. With a layer of dust on it.

This sounds like a criticism but it is not: I wish I could dislike the way you do

[GreyClock]

it's like they're so pretty it doesn't even qualify as pretty anymore
it's like when you're making a human the prettiness slider maxes out at like 80, and somebody modded out the bounds check and set these guys to 255[/i]

it's that amalgamated fashion model look. the female equivalent is weirdly similar. makes people look like aliens. I kinda respect the devotion to some form of physical perfection in some cases but it doesn't work for me either. the most attractive people you will ever meet are just random people you met in life.

I think attractive is the wrong word. As often they're everything but attractive.* I've been watching Orange Is the New Black and the lead character is not only very beautiful, but pretty, cute, goofy, charming, funny... yet somehow not attractive. By all accounts she should be, but nope... it's really strange and I don't understand it. I mean, I understand not everyone's attracted to everyone, but this seems more like some uncanny valley thing or whatever.

*I misunderstood your last line at first, but ugh...

[PhantomCatClock]

clock crew but for shockwave instead of flashw

[RobClock]

Happy weed day fellow degenerates

[miracle fruit]

Happy weed day fellow degenerates

the disgusting stench of pot smoke is unbearable today

i have been on the phone with 911 all day.

[zl]

I'm in Toronto this week and I was disappointed yesterday evening to not find the entire population smoking up. People were just walking around like they had other business to attend to.

[Slurpee]

I'm in Toronto this week and I was disappointed yesterday evening to not find the entire population smoking up. People were just walking around like they had other business to attend to.

[RobClock]

The new Halloween is pretty good.

[PhantomCatClock]

it was basically The 'Burbs starring Tom Hanks and very likely a sequel to Snowpiercer after they repopulated the earth

[PhantomCatClock]

i haven't seen it yet

[RobClock]

https://duke4.net/544-2/

This game cannot come down the pipe fast enough.