100 reasons not to visit Hell

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43. In Hell, correct grammatical syntax changes daily, and if you fail to use it right, nobody understands you.

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44. In hell, the only way to protect yourself from being raped constantly is to put on one of the hundreds of discarded, shit and semen soaked fursuits, which are used as cum rags by giant demons, but only when they're being worn.

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45.In hell there are no chairs except for those tacky inflatable ones that create static electricity. They also pop on you.

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46 in hell, toilet paper cleans itself with you.

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47. Upon entering Hell, you are given a complimentary 1982 Subaru Brat.

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19. Everywhere you can sit down has an erect dick poking out.

41. In Hell there's shit all over the place, and if you try to clean off your seat or sit down somewhere where there isn't any shit, as soon as you sit down you find that you've sat in the biggest shitpile of all.

48. In hell, everywhere you try to sit has a shitty dick ready to pound you.  You apparently try to clean the dicks off thinking it is a slightly better situation, but you fail.

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49. In hell, they have mustard gas instead of air.

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50. In Hell, everybody posts before you manage to finish typing, so you have to go back and change the numbers on your posts about why you should never visit Hell.

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51. The only thing on the internet is Naruto AMVs

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52. Satan is a member of the Lock Legion.

52b: He also administrates an invisionfree board for the Satan Squad.

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53. In hell, you have to play Tetris all the time, except you can't move the peices and you keep forgetting that you can't move the peices every time you figure it out.

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54 in hell, you still have to work and your job is to be an end agreement proof reader.

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55. No Clock Crew, Only Kitty Krew

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54. Satan is not a member of the Clock Crew.

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55. You don't have eyelids.

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56.The only places to eat are Shoneys and Burger King.

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56.The only places to eat are Shoneys and Burger King.

No Rams Horn?

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57. Everybody's name is Satan, including you. Except for the devil. His real name is Lucifer.

EDIT: Actually, screw that. His name is also Satan.

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58. In hell, there's delicious foods, rivers of lemonade and beer and wine and honey, hams and chicken legs flying around but everytime you take a bite it turns to ashes, everytime you take a sip, it turns to piss.

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59. It's hot.