Brief reviews of movies you saw recently

[miracle fruit]

i really wish they wouldve just made spiderman 4

[RobClock]

The Lone Ranger

Objectively, it's fucking awful. Johnny Depp's Tonto isn't funny, and although I personally don't find his character offensive, it's an annoyance how stupid this revised character is conceptually. The character of The Lone Ranger has taken it up the ass and become a clutzy jackass who conveniently stumbles head-first into victory on more than one occasion; reduced to a sidekick for Captain Jack-Crow-on-Head. Helena Bonham Carter was given a big part in the story just because. Her character was totally pointless and should have been cut.

It's an origin story, so the first two acts are spent blundering around. However there is a scene where someone gets' their heart cut out and eaten, at which the entire collective audience sorta leaned back in our seats thinking "this is a bit dark for a disney film". So that was cool.

The last 35 minutes of the movie are really the only part of it worth seeing. There's a great big train heisty type thing, and some gun shooty/horse ridey action, all accompanied by the Lone Ranger theme, signifying that the character had ultimately come to be at that point and all that sorta jazz. I genuinely like westerns, and with the lack of them in theatres these days, it was nice to see, I suppose. It's just a shame that the lead up to it was such corporate, committee designed trash.

I saw it with a group of friends. Jokes were cracked and flippant comments were made, and that sorta thing generally improves the theatre going experience for me. Maybe it would be less enjoyable if I were left to sit there alone and brood over all the parts that pissed me off, but regardless, my impression was that it was worth seeing maybe once - if youre into that sort of thing - and then forgotten about. Kemosabe.

4/10

[Slurpee]

Pacific Rim - go see Pacific Rim

[AMPM]

Pacific Rim - What fucking kind of name is that?

I think that's what Del Toro calls his asshole.

Also I saw The Heat, wow, it pretty much sucked.

Remember Skyfall? Saw that shit. Thought the first half wasn't bad, second half was lame. fcuking home alone with james bondg

[Slurpee]

Pacific Rim - What fucking kind of name is that?

I think that's what Del Toro calls his asshole.

actually, it's a major geographical feature of planet earth, and refers to the places along the edge of the Pacific Ocean, which are prominently featured in the film as the populated locations most endangered by the big cool monsters that get punched in the face by giant robots

[LeekClock]

Vertigo... Best movie of all time? I think no. Best Hitchcock? Nor that. The city of San Francisco was the most sympathetic character in the film. And as critics seem to have noted good and well at the time of its original release, it's a poorly paced, far-fetched waste of time.

The Hijacking / Kadringen... One of those movies that seems like there is an intelligent person behind it, so you wait generously for the redeeming quality or scene, and then the credits roll. I say you wait, because there's little to engage you in the film. The experience is like waiting for a bus, which you eventually realise has been cancelled without notification.

[RobClock]

Pacific Rim - 10/10

Go see it.

[miracle fruit]

the master was really good

and i also watched warm bodies and it was cool too!!!

[WrenchClock]

Kick-Ass 2

The action scenes were intense and the funny parts were hilarious, but the Union J part was super cringeworthy

[AmberArachnidClock]

the master was really good

I agree

[RobClock]

Kick-Ass 2

I saw the first one back when that came out, and i recall liking it a lot, but i haven't watched it since then and don't remember much.

The sequel was pretty damn good. The villains were equal parts despicable and hilarious, the action scenes were awesome, it was funny all around, and the 'down time' parts never dragged or had me losing interest.

Kick-Ass 2

The action scenes were intense and the funny parts were hilarious, but the Union J part was super cringeworthy

I think it was meant to be cringe-inducing? I don't know, but I really got the feeling like it wasn't necessarily being played straight.

[EvilBeanClock]

argo

this movie is racist

[miracle fruit]

iron man 3 ahahaha oh god well i enjoyed myself at least

[RobClock]

The World's End was great. Dunno if it'll survive in the popular culture the way the other Pegg/Frost movies have, but it's totally worth seeing.

[PhantomCatClock]

Wizards (1977)

"Wow, this is cool"

"Oh neat, this is really cool"

"..what the fuck?"

"...what the fuck?"

"Hey it's cool again"

"what the fuck?"

"Ok it's back to elves and stuff and not Hitler"

"Man, that ending was completely worth it, a ten second scene that really makes the whole hour and a half"

"...what the fuck."





So basically it was every other Ralph Bakshi movie

[Clocktopus]

Wreck-it Ralph
9/10

cute, funny, great writing/voice acting/characters/animation

i expected the game characters we've all come to love would be a huge part of this, i was wrong, still great references, and if you're a huge gamer it's really a fun little hour and a half movie.

also king candy is a huge asshole!!!

[miracle fruit]

Wizards (1977)

"Wow, this is cool"

"Oh neat, this is really cool"

"..what the fuck?"

"...what the fuck?"

"Hey it's cool again"

"what the fuck?"

"Ok it's back to elves and stuff and not Hitler"

"Man, that ending was completely worth it, a ten second scene that really makes the whole hour and a half"

"...what the fuck."





So basically it was every other Ralph Bakshi movie

i really need to watch these ralph bakshi movies they look neat

[AMPM]

Ralph Bakshi fucking blows fat dicks and his films are totally unwatchable imho


Blue Jasmine - Incredible acting, slightly less incredible character study, and substantially less competent plot and pacing. A little dull, but at times breath taking. An almost perfect film. 8/10

[PhantomCatClock]

What kind of buffoon doesn't like Fire and Ice and Fritz the Cat? He was like the first awful flash animator

[RobClock]

Ralph Bakshi fucking blows fat dicks and his films are totally unwatchable imho

Bakshi is one of the great names of the animation dark age. Learn some respect.