;_; SO SADDENING

[Slurpee]

I fail to see the relevance of the masturbation part of that story.

Perhaps I'm just getting old.

well he jacked off in the pool and bitches are going in the pool so bitches might get pregnant hth

[CourgetteClock]

well he jacked off in the pool and bitches are going in the pool so bitches might get pregnant hth

Oh shit, the last thing we need is more of those fuckers who jack of in their pool.

Life's a bitch.

[HeinekenClock]

If a woman touches a door she will get pregnant. A lot of men don't wash their hands after masturbating, leaving their sperm everywhere. The moment a women touches a door, the sperm crawl all over her looking for the egg.

[Beast]

"They've decided"? This guy needs some real friends.

Also, his fault for wanking in the pool. Honestly, can't he hang on till he can find a designated carrot polishing area?

[Sandiskman]

Let's crash his party and steal all the semen.
That'd teach him.

[TapedeckClock]

He should just tell everyone to get the fuck outta his house.

how could you deny hot chicks coming to swim with you?

[Marlin Clock]

Wouldn't the chlorine and temperature kill the sperm?

Unless he was in a hot tub I don't think temperature would be as much a factor.

Though the logistics involved are ridiculous enough.