marvel's biggest bone-liner

[PhantomCatClock]

i did, but Bombur's brother stole them away and i cannot send the nazgul after them because i forgot his name

[VCRClock]

what... is your name
what... is your quest
what... is the recommended tracking force for this phono cartridge? someone messed with the counterweight. i hope this place has wifi

[Slurpee]

*googles "phono cartridge"*

*writes down "vcr is smart?" and taps pen on clipboard thoughtfully*

[VCRClock]

yknow just using ccbt as a vessel for stuff nobody cares about

i remember seeing this 4chan greentext once where it's a story about a kid who has to do a presentation in class, but he's a Linux enjoyer and the computer won't Just Work with the classroom projector, and the teacher's all "ok hm well look maybe you can go another day who's next, and Linux kid gets all heated and says "no i can do it i just have to install the driver for the projector i swear"

in the previous post, i was playing records on a venue's turntables, but (as I said) something was fucky about how the turntables were set up, so I was all squinting at the needle trying to figure out what model it was so i could find the appropriate settings on the manufacturer's website. you may have seen this Big Bang Theory episode

in today's post, i take my laptop to work for the first time since my fresh Debian install, and discover that although i successfully configured my home wifi settings at install, the glorious Free Software program I formerly used to manage my wifi connections has been benched because it apparently depends on Python 2, so instead I've been issued a GUI network connection manager that doesn't work at all and I had to use my phone to google how to get on wifi using the cli. awesome



making things harder for myself than they need to be is the story of my life

[PhantomCatClock]

just wait for the guy who wrote the Skyrim Special Edition mod that made all the old mods work again to start using python and be so appalled that python3 is apparently not backwards-compatible that he writes a python program for running old python programs

[RobClock]

There was a job posting for an animation company in Nova Scotia where a storyboard artist I know works. I have applied, and while I'm inclined to think my amateur ass has no chance, I am really hoping I get it.

[RobClock]

yknow just using ccbt as a vessel for stuff nobody cares about

you mean this isn't a personal blog?

[PhantomCatClock]

make your passion pursuing this passion so you can keep going no matter what happens



unrelated but bodies are fucking gross sometimes. you know when you like.. your fingertip itches, so you look on WebMD and it's like, "Yeah, that's Berlin Disease. You'll be dead in a week." I recently started waking up to oh wait there's no spoiler tag nevermind

[PhantomCatClock]

ok i made a spoiler tag but was too lazy to make a button in the editor (subs-editor for my future ref) should work in every browser but if you have javascript disabled you'll have to manually select the text

[PhantomCatClock]

"it doesn't work in Links" beat you to it

[VCRClock]

I hope you've paid your membership dues to the National Association for the Advancement of Shit-Ass Bears

[PhantomCatClock]

oh the button was working this whole time, i just didn't give it a custom image so it defaulted to the youtube one (?) and I didn't notice it.



i feel like it should either go next to colors or after subscript hmm hmm hmmm

[PhantomCatClock]

oh yeah, bodies are gross

[gross]:

so you know when you like feel a piece of sand on your wrist but there's nothing there so you check WebMD and they say it's Dirtworm Space Disease and you have forty-five minutes to live? I was waking up to hard, dried blood in my belly button for like a week a little while ago, maybe two months, and decided to finally look it up online.

"Nope. You're fine. That happens sometimes."

aw shit, maybe I am dying this time

anyway that did stop but now (and spoilered because this one is actually fucked up and gross) did you know it is possible for your shits to be 50% shit and 50% mucous? (also apparently mucus and mucous are both correct because I don't see a red squiggly line. I hope they both mean the same thing.)
WebMD & Friends are like, "if you have that, along with THIS, THIS, THIS, and THIS, that's—"
nope, have none of those
"...well, if you have that along with THIS, THIS, THIS, AAAAAAAAAAND THIS—"
i mean, i have one of those, but it kind of fits the theme of having this at all
"OKAY OKAY well get ready to staple your ass shut if you have that with these following symptoms:——"
i don't have any of those symptoms, either
"yeah you're fine, that happens sometimes"




when did WebMyDoom get so chill



when did i get so old that i have "symptoms" i used to just wake up, jack off, and go back to sleep









tl;dr this is a post about entropy

[PhantomCatClock]

to be clear i don't feel great but i did also have some poison dumplings that had a "freeze by" date March 2020 last week so hollywood is currently filming an osmosis jones remake inside me right now

[Slurpee]

bodies are gross

I'm so paranoid about that shit now lol

here are the symptoms that meant I was dying, apparently:
- itchy on my right thigh
- would wake up all sweaty sometimes
- upper back pain that kept moving around
- got tired more easily (needed ~45 minute long rests after 2 mile long walks)
- pass out every few months (okay this one... I'll admit I probably should have been more concerned about)

here's what I did about them:
- bought ointment. with cortisol
- cracked the window open while sleeping
- started paying more attention to my posture and sleeping on my back instead of my side with a pillow under my legs for support
- rested
- drank more water and was careful not to stand up too fast

because those are all also just things that can happen to you for no good reason
and webmd and mayo clinic did NOT help connect the dots on those for me at all. the way I found out was that on my second emergency room visit one of the doctors (who thankfully listened to my lengthy blabbing about everything that had been wrong with me the preceding year or so) had a hunch and ordered a cat scan

I thought I was just getting older. I still have no idea what being in your mid-30's is actually supposed to feel like, physically. according to the internet I'll have a better idea between 4 months and 2 years from now

[Slurpee]

oh... so, this is weird

the other day I had the phrase "I'm sorry, _____. there's a monster inside me" in my head and I couldn't remember where it was from, so I googled it. it was P.T. I had it slightly wrong, the line is "forgive me, lisa, there's a monster inside of me" and it's scrolled above the doorway in one of the loops.
while googling it, I saw there was a television series called "Monsters Inside Me" and I was like "well that sounds fucking rad" but it turns out it was just a documentary show about people with diseases, and not a cool show about a dude with monsters inside of him

then I was like
wait, that's a euphemism for disease? ... I had kind of a thing about monsters inside of people, didn't I?
there was P.T., which I was hung up on for way longer than most people
I was also crazy about that scene in the Evil Dead remake where the girl was whispering to her brother right after her first encounter with the thing about it being "in here with us" and it wasn't clear if she was talking about the room or herself
then there were those scenes from 10 Earth Shattering Blows and Wilde Life that I posted in this very thread




and I was like, "... holy shit, was my fucking subconscious trying to tell me that something was wrong? "

and that made me remember,
I was going to post something pretty early on bitching about the cancer things that were making me miserable but decided I didn't want to bum anybody out, but one of the things was

9) random fucking nightmare imagery, nonsensical and disturbingly vivid, will pop into my head for no reason when I'm on the verge of sleep.
?????????
it's hard to give any specific examples because I've actively tried not to retain any of them, but trust me they are very distressing. there was this deformed englishman who looked like a human playing card riding a faceless mechanical horse through a landfill of stale, rotting corpses. there was this towering, enormous completely smooth pearly white seashell with two massive holes oozing fucking swimming pools worth of an unnaturally bright red viscous fluid. I can't even explain why they're so upsetting, they're just these brief frames of bizarre, horrible things that pop into my head with no context or explanation. I'd call them fever dreams because they and the fevers both seem to only come at night, but they didn't start until the chemo started, and the fevers are a symptom of the lymphoma, which the chemo is supposed to be counteracting, and I know it's absurd but I can't help but be put in the mind that it's the cancer somehow lashing out through some lovecraftian mechanism to terrify or punish me for attacking it

so then I started to really hone in on this idea like what the fuck what the fuck is cancer literally a literal fucking monster

like... magical thinking, you know? it was late and I was tired.

but then I checked the upload dates of those webcomic pages and I was on that shit in like 2020, and I didn't get diagnosed until last year. [sigh of relief emoji] so, no, I'm probably just correlating some things that aren't actually connected. I probably just thought that the idea of monsters inside of people was cool because I like monsters and horror stuff. that nightmare imagery thing was still kind of weird, though.



but THEN I was like wait, no, when I was diagnosed I was already at stage 4
so I googled how long it takes for lymphoma to progress, and it can take years, so
cancer is definitely literally an actual monster with psychic powers. case closed.

[Slurpee]

oh also

this is an animated png!
is it animated for you guys?
it is on my machines

you can make animated pngs now. hooray

they've promised me for years we would have animated PNGs and I never see any. I saw one example nearly a decade ago and that was it. where are my jetpacks and animated PNGs? I thought this was the future.

flounderman from the past, I made an animated png. you can rest easy

[Slurpee]

also also

it reminds me of a puzzle book I had when I was a kid
mad libs briefly had a spin-off where every page was a fun little puzzle in a larger mystery story, a bit like professor layton except the puzzles actually made sense in context
in one of them there's a big machine with a bunch of switches and knobs and meters and stuff, and a list of instructions like "if the electrometizer is below 10, the waveulator must be set to an even number, if the particalmostat is off, the waveulator must be set to a number divisible by 3, unless the razmotron is set to pulse"

and you were supposed to figure out why the machine wasn't working
and the solution was it isn't plugged in, wakka wakka!
but as a kid I still loved just looking at all the little knobbies and troubleshooting this fictional machine, even though I saw the loose plug in like 3 seconds
I had loose plans to rip it off for a video game, but then somebody else already made Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes and Space Team

I bought a copy of this off ebay lol




hooray for indulgence

[Slurpee]

islamic sonic the hedgehog says "found you... fakir!"

[patriotclock]

👋