marvel's biggest bone-liner

[Slurpee]

lol

[RobClock]

This made me nostalgic for getting banned on a web forum

[PhantomCatClock]

oh apparently you guys aren't welcome because it's only on the discord but there's a clockmas collab.

🎁 Clockmas Collab: Stealing Christmas / The Great Christmas Heist / name pending 🎁

That no good Clock Crew has had enough and is going full grinch on Christmas this year.

Your objective is to steal Christmas. Make it personal, give a good reason why your character is doing this. It can be done however you want, wherever you want. Newgrounds, Clocktopia, Atlanta, the sky is the limit. We'll figure out the intro and the setup, and how to conclude the movie after we get sign ups. Say which characters you're going to use in your part, so we can avoid reusing the same characters.

Tentative deadline is 12/23/24 so we can do all the post last second as tradition.

Specs:
Around 30-60 seconds per part
MP4 format
24 fps
16:9 aspect ratio (720p or above)
Usual content guidelines. Don't be a fuckhead.

[Slurpee]

[Slurpee]

oh apparently you guys aren't welcome because it's only on the discord but there's a clockmas collab.

🎁 Clockmas Collab: Stealing Christmas / The Great Christmas Heist / name pending 🎁

That no good Clock Crew has had enough and is going full grinch on Christmas this year.

Your objective is to steal Christmas. Make it personal, give a good reason why your character is doing this. It can be done however you want, wherever you want. Newgrounds, Clocktopia, Atlanta, the sky is the limit. We'll figure out the intro and the setup, and how to conclude the movie after we get sign ups. Say which characters you're going to use in your part, so we can avoid reusing the same characters.

Tentative deadline is 12/23/24 so we can do all the post last second as tradition.

Specs:
Around 30-60 seconds per part
MP4 format
24 fps
16:9 aspect ratio (720p or above)
Usual content guidelines. Don't be a fuckhead.

eurrrghagalagahahllllI actually have a decent pitch for the wrapper segments but I don't feel like logging into discord so I'm posting it here

since the theme is kind of insane (a whole bunch of characters unrelatedly each deciding to steal christmas for their own reasons) we've sort of accidentally reinvented the plot of the movie The Signal (2007) from first principles. we could play into that and just actually give it an overarching plot in the same vein as The Signal (2007) (or The Crazies, or Condemned 2: Bloodshot, etc.) and have some mysterious phenomenon that's causing people to go insane and think that they should steal christmas

HEAR ME OUT, I know that sounds lame and I've fallen off a bit recently but I swear this is a good pitch

so the wrapper segment can be a character (should probably be a funny but surprising pick, the way e.g. hamburger was in ptf2. somebody who's given us gold in the past but hasn't really been canonized as a go-to major player. somebody like bbqbeefburgerman, or uhhh dwarf would be funny, or maybe godclock. or fagbagclock. fagbag wasn't real but he can just be real now for no reason and also the protagonist? I think that would be funny. (y'know, or just thor or flounderman again, there's a reason they're guaranteed crowdpleasers))

that parenthetical went on for a long time so I'm starting the sentence over

so the wrapper segment can be a character noticing the phenomenon and going to investigate and put a stop to it, but in a comical half-assed way ala the ring: clock style

so the structure would be:
intro/set-up: the phenomenon of people stealing christmas is identified and x goes to investigate (or is put on the case by a lazy half-assed admin who doesn't feel like doing it? whatever would be funny) (could be preceded by one or two segments of people stealing christmas)
[misc collab segments]
middle bit (maybe? maybe two middle bits? maybe none?): x investigates further, believes they have identified the cause and culprit
[more misc collab segments] maybe escalating in severity?
end bit: x confronts the villain (another good place for a rare funny character pick. actually it would be kinda funny to me to have it be cherimoyaclock, I don't think cherimoya ever appeared in a flash movie except as the villain of the ring clock style. (but I'm probably the only one who would think that was funny so probably not this actually)) and the villain explains that they're not actually doing anything, the clock crew is just full of jerks who all decided to steal christmas for their own reasons and the protagonist is like "oh"

[PhantomCatClock]

i told poly you said you'd make all those

[PhantomCatClock]

(i didn't don't let me discourage you yer doin' a good job)

[Slurpee]

I hate the goddamned internet so fucking much. who the fuck's idea was it to make everything this fucking useless and obnoxious.





NOBODY WANTS ANY OF THIS BULLSHIT ON ANY WEBSITE EVER FUCK YOU

[Slurpee]

sorry I was writing a paper on the threat that quantum computing poses to traditional encryption-based internet security and the fact that I can't even visit the fucking MIT Technology Review without telling 30 different pieces of bullshit to fuck off drove me into a blind rage.

they're basically pop-ups. you realize that? we might as well have just kept pop-ups, it's the same fucking thing. html5 was a mistake. HTML5 WAS A MISTAKE. HTML5 WAS A MISTAKE.

[Slurpee]

something perversely humorous about reading and writing about one standards organization (NIST) very competently doing everything they can to guard us against potential future misuse of technology that doesn't even exist yet while being forced to navigate through the absolute hellscape unleashed by the careless despicable bastards at another (W3C)

[Slurpee]

I finished the report but maybe I should scrap it and write a new one about how the internet sucks and I hate it. it can be titled "fuck the goddamned fucking internet" and its contents will just be 400 screenshots of various websites captioned "look at this shit." "do you believe this shit?" ETC.

[Slurpee]

i told poly you said you'd make all those

I might could!
this is the last week of instruction this semester before finals and I don't want to commit to anything yet because it might be kinda hard to switch gears but that's a goodly amount of weekly time to be freeing up for somebody who's been, I don't mean to brag, kinda nailing it this semester

[VCRClock]

I finished the report but maybe I should scrap it and write a new one about how the internet sucks and I hate it. it can be titled "fuck the goddamned fucking internet" and its contents will just be 400 screenshots of various websites captioned "look at this shit." "do you believe this shit?" ETC.

hi can this actually be a listicle? also can you estimate how long it'll take to read and put that at the top so I know if I should bother. thans

[PhantomCatClock]

mj12bot already scraped the finished article before slurpee wrote it so for $125,000 you can have access to a large language model that was trained on it, instead

[PannacottaClock]

unpopular opinion i don't think it's reasonable to expect any amount of the king's HORSES to be able to put a man together again

[PhantomCatClock]

it's easy for you kids to say that now but for those of us that remember, humpty was worth it

[Slurpee]

hey just checking, did any of you guys kill the ceo of unitedhealthcare? I guess somebody killed him and it's some big mystery or something

[FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK]

I'm a method animator

[PhantomCatClock]

slurpee, you're not making any sense. how could the ceo of healthcare die in america? stupid.

[Slurpee]

texting "ummm, YES, I'm fine, the tsunami didn't kill me, if you even care" to everybody in my contacts