EVOLUTION: The Winners!

[SnakeClock]

e v o L U T I O N

At least, the votes have been counted, and the winners of the Evolution writing contest can be announced! It's a bit of an upset, to be sure, but all the entries, in my opinion, were superb. Anyways, on to the victors:

• BEST OVERALL
  
• The Raw Deal, by SnakeClock
  

SnakeClock's story about a housecat being frustrated because she got the short end of the evolution stick, especially compared to domestic dogs, showed evolution both as it relates to how it makes the animals we know today, and also depicts it in a more personal way. SnakeClock's story about a sly cat coming to grips with her own catness has won the Best Overall Story award.

• BEST PLOT
  
• The Raw Deal, by SnakeClock[/u]
  

Sally the housecat's journey to figure out just why the some of the biggest, mightiest animals in the world are "cats" like her, and yet she's so much smaller and weaker than them. She travels about her city, trying to come to grips with it all, especially when she sees a bunch of loutish dogs that are supposed to be evolutionarily superior to her. Her odd interactions with these other creatures, as well as her own personal reflections of what is happening, was voted as the Best Plot.

• BEST STYLE
  
• The Raw Deal, by SnakeClock
  

Told in the first person view of Sally, the sassy housecat's narration of her trying to come to grips with how evolution didn't favour her, as well as her detailed descriptions of the places she goes and the other creatures she meets, has been voted as the Best Style of the stories.

• BEST USE OF THEME
  
• The Raw Deal, by SnakeClock
  

Well, it is a story about evolution, both in its most scientific and its most personal forms. Other stories have dealt with it in more abstract concepts, but the fact of the matter is that all of us are caught up in evolution, and sometimes we can't help but wonder how it affects us. Sally's own observations of this has been voted as the Best Use of Theme.

• MOST ORIGINAL
  
• The Raw Deal, by SnakeClock
  

People often wonder how our pets think, and what sort of personalities they would have. SnakeClock's interpretation of dogs being loyal to a fault and calling their owners "Master", and cat's general tolerant skepticism but snideness about this whole "pet" thing, as well as his more personal view on classical evolution, has been seen by the voters as the Most Original entry.

• FUNNIEST
  
• Evolveolution, by Topcatyo[/u]
  

Whew! Finally, SnakeClock's story lets up for a second. Say what you will about it, it wasn't that funny, but Topcatyo's story is as funny as it gets! A kid trying his best to evolve his Pikachu on his Pokémon game (even though it doesn't level up through experience; you need to give it a Thunder Stone to evolve it) escalates to a darkly comic climax where the kid finally gets some damn free time to win at his game. This hilariously macabre buildup of an innocent pastime like Pokémon earned Topcat's story the Lollermask.

I'd also like to give an honourable mention to "Twist's" story, "McCloud Nine Prime", a hilarious slash fiction about Optimus Prime, Fox McCloud, and a sheep. I thought it was a riot, but the votes were against it.

• BEST POETRY
  
• Humanity, by ChampagneClock
  

A newcomer to these writing contest, Champagne's sardonic sonnet about the drawbacks of human evolution had struck a chord with the voters and earned her the Best Poetry award.


Good work, everyone! My sympathies to the entrants that didn't walk away with any Best Ofs, but all the participants will get this handsome little award added to their showcase for their artistic contributions:

You can still read all the entries here, if you like. A new writing contest will be announced this Sunday, so keep your eyes peeled. Thanks to the writers and readers!

[PirateClock]

Dude if you are going to give yourself 6 medals im going to burn the clockcrew severs to the ground.

[SnakeClock]

Dude if you are going to give yourself 6 medals im going to burn the clockcrew severs to the ground.

I knew you'd be the first to give me hell about it.

I'll have to see how this goes.

[DiscoBallClock]

The plot thickens.



See what I did there.

[SnakeClock]

Maybe the next contest will be everyone writing a story about PirateClock plotting my downfall.

[TruncheonClock]

Next Contest Topic: Downfall

[AnkhClock]

Serious question how many people voted?


Because I didn't :/

[salt]

are you the one who judges all the entries?

[salt]

oh there was voting?

sorry nevermind

[SnakeClock]

Serious question how many people voted?


Because I didn't :/

Five. I usually call a contest after five votes; it's a decisive, uneven number that can break ties.

[Slurpee]

contest with 7 entries gives 7 awards to 3 people after 5 votes

[SnakeClock]

contest with 7 entries gives 7 awards to 3 people after 5 votes

Do you want me to call the contest off again until I get more? Because this contest was hard enough to end as it is.

Get 31 people to vote, maybe that'll be better.

[patriotclock]

Referring to yourself in the third person and dominating a contest you run that no one else cares about doesn't make you more of a man sorry.

[SnakeClock]

You'll all be glad to know I'm sitting out the next contest.

[patriotclock]

You'll all be glad to know I'm sitting out the next contest.

We all probably don't care very much at all actually.

[SnakeClock]

We all probably don't care very much at all actually.

:idgi:
For what it's worth.

[WobbuffetClock]

Shit, I forgot to vote.
I thought VoodooClock's thing deserved best style, but whatever.

Maybe the next contest will be everyone writing a story about PirateClock plotting my downfall.

This could totally work.

[Slurpee]

snake, you have 26 awards, 16 of which are for writing contests, which you run, apparently on the basis of 5 votes because too few people care enough about them to vote on.

for contrast, bbqbeefburgerman has submitted 80 movies to newgrounds, won 4 newgrounds awards, and got his own collection page, for which he has 8 awards, and that's after we instilled the cumulative flash awards to rectify an imbalance in reward for flash production.

to be as blunt as possible, you're a wacky fountain of awards for shit nobody cares about, and you've completely soaked yourself in them

treat the system with some fucking dignity jeet christ.

[SnakeClock]

snake, you have 26 awards, 16 of which are for writing contests, which you run, apparently on the basis of 5 votes because too few people care enough about them to vote on.

for contrast, bbqbeefburgerman has submitted 80 movies to newgrounds, won 4 newgrounds awards, and got his own collection page, for which he has 8 awards, and that's after we instilled the cumulative flash awards to rectify an imbalance in reward for flash production.

to be as blunt as possible, you're a wacky fountain of awards for shit nobody cares about, and you've completely soaked yourself in them

treat the system with some fucking dignity jeet christ.

To be fair, only the most recent 5 were won while I was in charge of the writing contests. The rest of them I won while Sage was in charge of the writing contests.

But I do feel bad about this.

[TequilaClock]

snake, you have 26 awards, 16 of which are for writing contests, which you run, apparently on the basis of 5 votes because too few people care enough about them to vote on.

for contrast, bbqbeefburgerman has submitted 80 movies to newgrounds, won 4 newgrounds awards, and got his own collection page, for which he has 8 awards, and that's after we instilled the cumulative flash awards to rectify an imbalance in reward for flash production.

to be as blunt as possible, you're a wacky fountain of awards for shit nobody cares about, and you've completely soaked yourself in them

treat the system with some fucking dignity jeet christ.

I am not treating you or some shit, but I haven't seen you doing any contests lately. But I could be terribly mistaken.