The Clock Crew was a blessing to me at the tender age of 13; it offered a new space for my identity to inhabit, at a time when my store of life experience was ballooning,  with nowhere into which to expand. My own identity was confused and outworn, bombarded by challenges from the real world, and really only a swollen shell of my boyhood identity. I was anxious; I, my persona, had no apparent direction to adopt.

That is to say, the Clock Crew offered a new identity into which to expand seemingly limitlessly,  in the form of a completely abstract object -- LeekClock -- restricted only by the few, plastic values of the Clock Crew.

How exciting is unrestrained growth: In LeekClock I proceeded to cultivate an aspect of me that had shrivelled, atrophied, due to inaction: my creative intelligence. This has granted me more than the ability to draw pretty pictures; it has made me a better communicator, not only with the outside world but with my own being.

Now i'm 21 and there's a Clock Crew tattoo on my left forearm because I don't want to forget this gift of experience. The tattoo is not a dedication to an internet group, it's a memorial to whomever it was that died and made way for me -- because I do consider myself someone else now.

And now many years after I fatefully blew in here, I feel my identity chafing again as I grow, stunting me. I'm outgrowing my identity again, and LeekClock is an appendage of that identity.

To simply acknowledge that we are bound by the situated image we have of ourselves is emancipating; we can see it is imagined; we can shed it, grow a new one, not limited as the previous one which was once so full of possibility.

This is why bands dissolve and reform as new entities under different names, more than the sum of their parts. This is part of why people find dissociative drugs such an appealing escape. This is why people change their appearance, travel to different countries, learn a new skill; we need to challenge the limits  of ourselves. This is how people "grow up", or rather "grow outwards".

I'm not leaving or abandoning this group, but I shall be adopting a new nom de guerre.

This thread wasn't really meant to be about me though. I just wanted to say: If you're feeling anxious and like you have no options, maybe you are restricted by the framework you've established for yourself.  If that's the case, blow the lid off your assumed identity and expand into an ambitious and exciting new one that is so challenging and alien that you wouldn't have entertained the idea before. There very probably wont come another chance to do this, or a time when things will work themselves out.

Ok I read it all now and well, wise wording LeekClock albiet unnecessarily deep.

I can't question how you feel nor will I say I fully understand but I only wish to proclaim that you will always have a place in the ClockCrew and we will always love you no matter what or who you become.

I'm still working on living up to my own expectations within my current self.

I have never lived up to any of my own expectations of myself

This is an internet flash community mostly dedicated to spamming one particular website to annoy prepubescent teenagers.

Well Master Leek, I congratulate you on your success... I shall endeavour to take your advice to heart as I am currently probing the realm of my identity as well.
 
May all your attempts bring you success in this crazy world!
~Pillz

Radical self transformation is a pretty amazing thing.

1.) For me, the first time I watched strawberryclock VI i cried. The clockcrew's ideals are a part of my everyday life. When I consume media I try to look at it the clock crew way. I discovered the clock crew at an early age and my identity is directly connected to my clock persona.

2.) Jon Beaton is great, but LeekClock earned my love and respect.

I want to be a black woman.

It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. And this bag was, like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in.

There is such a great subculture we have created here. I have been thinking quite often lately, that what we do here and how we act, our avatars and what we do, is truly unique. I joined this group in the fifth grade, just after i had got flash and slowly but surely taught myself how to use it. I'm a senior now, 7 years later, and what I have been taught and learned has been something that without a doubt will be something I will never forget.

You see a slice of every side of life here, you get folks coming in and out that can do the things you dream of and some are even willing to help you reach your goals. For me, as a 11 year old kid on the forums, it taught me most of all internet etiquette, how to act mature and find humor beyond what is slapstick. Its a completely priceless experience, and for a budding artist or socialite there is no better way to come about.

Come on, theclockcrew is not a replacement for a personality, people.

I am and have always been the best.

Nice.

Quote from: PropagandaClock;1677342unnecessarily deep.

Is there really such a thing? Go read a newspaper or middle school English papers then. The topic is clearly pretty important to him so why not explain it right if you are going to explain it at all.

Quote from: Sinister On Fire Clock;1677353This is an internet flash community mostly dedicated to spamming one particular website to annoy prepubescent teenagers.

Yeah nothing of artistic merit ever comes out of the clock crew.

yeah clock crew is a cool place. there's usually a lot of support here

Quote from: Rum;1677422Is there really such a thing? Go read a newspaper or middle school English papers then. The topic is clearly pretty important to him so why not explain it right if you are going to explain it at all.

I have to agree, I thought it was a rather odd statement as well.

And I found your insight pretty profound, Leek. I believe I am going through something very similar but hadn't quite realized it in those terms yet.

Quote from: DWARFINATOR;1677375I want to be a black woman.

I can get you half way there! Go to Thailand for the other half.

I feel I should say something deep, but that is only because I am low on sleep, which makes my mind wander in a way i'm not used to. But I think the reason I joined the CC was because there's something about the people here that helps to open you up. The Clocks that you come to know and love, seek guidance from, the community, it represents something more. That in this society, we all pretty much just get along, the battles are for fun and never overly bloody, and that we can all be who we want to be. And as we better develop that part of us that we want to be in here, we can better express it out in the rest of our lives.
 
Thank you LeekClock for sharing your story with us, that we may better find ourselves. And thank the rest of you for being who you are, and for putting up with my drunk-like midnight rambling. If you can't understand these and the rest of the Clock Crew's ideals, then kindly get the fuck out.
(get it? GET IT????????)

I can't tell if i should laugh or take your e-stories seriously.