Monthly Writing 1!

[Silly Putty Clock]

Joe searched his pockets hurriedly or any sort of firearm.  "You didn't give me a gun!" shouted Joe exasperatedly.

"Don't be daft, my boy, look in your secret agent pocket," shouted Marzec in a toned that implied "You should know better."  Joe opened up his suit coat and checked inside the lapel and felt his hand touch an object that was hard and smooth that he didn't touch at his previous job.

Joe pulled a Desert Eagle out of his pocket and pointed it in a random direction.

Um, Marzec gave him a gun in the post before mine.

[Topcatyo]

Um, Marzec gave him a gun in the post before mine.

Well goddamn.

[Silly Putty Clock]

Well goddamn.

Sorry.

[Topcatyo]

Joe searched his pockets hurriedly or any sort of firearm. "I forget where I put my gun!" shouted Joe exasperatedly.

"Don't be daft, my boy, look in your secret agent pocket," shouted Marzec in a toned that implied "You should know better." Joe opened up his suit coat and checked inside the lapel and felt his hand touch the handle of the revolver that he proceeded to whip out.  "Without even thinking you made use of your secret agent pocket before I told you.  The mark of a true natural."  Marzec gave an approving wink.

Joe aimed his gun in a random direction.


THERE FIXED

[DiscoBallClock]

You guys make me sick. No posts in 10 days? That's why we can't have nice things.

Anyway:

Even though Joe aimed his gun, there was nothing to be seen. The morphing object had disappeared.
"Huh?..." mumbled Joe. He had started to wonder in what he had put himself into.
"Don't let yer guard down!" blared Marzec. "It could attack at any time!"
"Let what attack-" started Joe, before being interrupted by a harsh blow to the back, which made him fly for a couple of feet.
"That. You gotta be on your toes all the time."
Joe looked behind him.

[Sombra]

He tried to focus his gaze upon what he saw ahead: a flowing, twitching mass of some chameleon-like substance.
"...the fuck?" Joe exclaimed, turning his head toward Marzek.
"AIM FOR THE KNEE JOINTS, SON!"
Was this insane man joking? Knee joints? He turned back to fire at its "knees" thinking to himself I can hardly see the goddamn thing how'mI gonna shoot its knees what if I'm not cut out for this shit will they fire me will they kill me and incinerate my body blow me up like the secretary (she was a spy) maybe if I quit right now they'll let me live, but it was gone.

In the moment he had turned his head it fell back, no doubt preparing for another stealth attack– the kill, upon Joe.

He studied the yard. A row of birch trees stretching up at the smoggy city sky. To his left, a solitary weeping willow keeping watch over a nearby pond. Below the tree, a pencil-thin branch snapped. Then another. Joe became alert and he could see it again now, barely, under the tree.

With its stealth attack blown, the thing charged. Joe wasn't about to try fighting this thing and he began to run away, tripping over his own foot. He fell back, his head striking the ground hard. "UNGH," he exclaimed, and his trigger finger twitched on the pistol. A split second after the crack of the pistol, Joe heard a pained roar.

[Silly Putty Clock]

"The pain!" roared Marzec. He had fallen to the ground, clutching the obliterated big toe on his left foot. "Sorry!" yelled Joe as he took aim again. He pulled the trigger, but all he heard was a soft clicking noise. The gun had jammed! Gigantic footprints were appearing in the dirt alarmingly close to where Joe had fallen. He closed his eyes and prepared for-

Nothing. Joe opened his eyes again and looked around. The path of footprints had veered off and now led towards Marzec. Evidently, the beast had left in favour of weakened prey. Now, clouds of dust were rising in a horribly predictable pattern. The fat man tried to crawl away, but it was no use. "What the fuck are ya waitin for?" he shouted at the top of his lungs, "Shoot!"
Something had to be done. Joe had run out of ideas. There was only one thing to do.
"Leave him the fuck alone, you big invisible cockmunch!" Joe screamed at the thing. "What's the matter, you big shit, can't handle a guy with ten toes? You fat fuck! I'm a porn star, you know that? I bet I fucked your mom! I bet I fucked her on camera, and as we speak some middle-aged schmuck with a mullet is jerking off to her in his mom's basement! Did you know I did sheiza porn? I did it all! I banged them all! I bet you're mom's on film somewhere with shit on her face and BIG FUCKING ELECTRIC NIPPLE CLAMPS! I bet she's on film with me! You know why? BECAUSE I HAVE BALLS OF FUCKING STEEL AND A TEN-INCH PECKER. What do you say to that?"

You've gotta give the guy credit. The monster turned in its tracks and turned a ghastly shade of dark black. Only, you know, darker and blacker.

[GearBoxClock]

Marzec had gotten naked.

[I1I1I1I1I1I1I11111I1I1I1IIIIIII1I1I1I1I11I]

It was an average day for Billy. Waking to see his father sitting on the edge of his bed holding a belt and snapping it menacingly. With a bored face, Billy dodged the belt like he always did, grabbed some clothes he had set on his dresser the night before and jogged down stairs. There his mother sat, not moving an inch, just the same as last week. " I probably should check if she's dead sometime" thought Billy as he grabbed his usual possum from his kitchen floor for breakfast. Billy's parents did not have enough money to get him an education, so he would sit out on the street selling cocaine to get money for his father to " have a fun time " with hookers. His father's idea of a fun time was to beat up the hookers and steal their money. After Billy was finished selling his usual goods, just the same as everyday, he packed up and headed home. He set up his clothes on his dresser. When he got up, it was an average day for Billy...

[I1I1I1I1I1I1I11111I1I1I1IIIIIII1I1I1I1I11I]

forgot that i have to continue it. I'll think of a new one

[TheClockNessMonster]

Joe ran out the door and was in such a hurry he forgot to lock it behind him. He flailed his hand in the air and whistled to hail a cab. The taxi stopped, and the door opened. Joe got in hastily and said "420 Hughen Street, and fast." The cab made a U-Turn and shot off, then sharply turned a corner at a set of lights. Joe looked around the cab and checked his watch. He was already an hour late. The cab drove for 10 minutes around the city, entering areas slowly getting less busy. It turned into a small grove with not a single car or pedestrian on the the street. Joe looked around the area confused.  It drove faster and faster, ducking through alleyways then slowed down to an underground car park. "This isn't where i asked to go..." The doors locked shut and the cab driver turned to look at Joe as his bony fist came out from behind the front seat and smashed Joe right between the eyes. Everything went black as he passed out.

[DiscoBallClock]

Silly Putty's post is the best so far.

The monster was now glaring at Joe. It looked like it wanted to kill a bro.
Joe gulped. 'What the fuck did I just say' he thought, as the monster creeped closer to him. His body was paralyzed, shaking slightly. "Kill him, dumbass!" yelled Marzec from behind the monster.
"Oh, right." said Joe, and promptly tried to shoot him. Of course, the gun was jammed. 'Fuck.' he pondered.
"Uh...your mom...is lousy in bed?" he quietly told the beast before his eyes.

[DiscoBallClock]

Well dudes this was fun but the month is up. Good job everyone, if you want a PM with some criticism hit me up and I'll write something.

The next MW will be in March, stay tuned!