Food Pr0n

[RenegadeClock]

A thread for posting photos of food to jerk off to!

Here's a Salmon fillet I got at a restaurant in downtown Portland. It's got a mango salsa and some fancy ass teriyaki jizz on it.


I made this pulled pork quiche with sautéed onions and peppers, and cheese grits for breakfast when my sister came to visit the other week. I usually just put the veggies in the quiche, but my nephew was there too and he's a little punk about eating his veggies.

[Slurpee]

I put butter on a pop-tart because Family Guy said to. pics next time

[RenegadeClock]

I put butter on a pop-tart because Family Guy said to. pics next time

Still waiting...


Here's some magic getting ready to happen:

[Slurpee]

Still waiting...

ok


here is my box of pop tarts
I prefer the non frosted kind, and blueberry, but it is hard to find non frosted blueberry. I have not tried this with frosting because I don't want to be stuck with a box of frosted pop tarts if it doesn't work out, but you can feel free to experiment. This is a nascent art form.


better angle


here we come upon a conundrum: the pop tart is rounded toward the part with the holes in it. do we butter the convex part that will allow the butter to spread into its pores, and risk losing butter, or the concave part that will hold the butter, but perhaps not absorb it? I have tried it both ways and find I prefer the former. I make up for the butter loss by putting too much butter entirely. I am an adult.


Here we find our toaster, and I opt for the toaster oven, as opposed to the conventional popping toaster, as it allows more precise control over your toasted goods. This is a Breville compact smart oven with element IQ. MSRP $179.99, but you can't pay too much for quality toast.


as the butter melts, take a moment to reflect upon the sad life that has brought you to this moment. Forget About The Pop Tarts. Put Them Out Of Your Mind.


at this point, you have probably ejaculated all over your crumb trap from how greatt hese pop tarts are about to taste


clean yourself up. there's a good lad.


serve warm. Regret everything.

[Slurpee]

for lack of other activity I hereby proclaim this thread the Slurpee Posts Nasty Shit He Cooks For Himself Thread

 today I made an omelette filled with the food of my people



this is definitely what an omelette should look like

[RenegadeClock]

this is definitely what an omelette should look like

I thought it was some giant nacho chip when I first saw it.

I'll post more to this thread soon. I've just been stuck inside my house, eating frozen leftovers, for the last six days because of the snow.

[Slurpee]

frozen leftovers,

post pics

[BilliardBall10]

post pics

frozen food

fixed.

you're welcome slurpee!

[RenegadeClock]

post pics

Leftover chili from last week. Cheese fixes everything!

[Slurpee]

okay im a little disappointed nobody noticed the headless body and creeping horseman in these photos so I'm just going to highlight them






need to be more watchful for spooks spectres and ghosts, clock crew. and you have the gall to call yourselves a supernatural crimefighting team.

[AstronautClock]

alright I'll post a real omelette when I make one slurpee

[RenegadeClock]

need to be more watchful for spooks spectres and ghosts, clock crew. and you have the gall to call yourselves a supernatural crimefighting team.

Dude, you ate a haunted pop-tart. With butter on it!