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Funniest Game Reviews Ever: Zero Punctuation

Farted by SageClock, September 27, 2007, 05:37:04 PM

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TequilaClock

#800
July 31, 2009, 01:48:54 PM
Quote from: camoclock;1634665Underutilized by both third and first-party companies and condensed to just simple waggles with some button mashing in between?
Actually, it's mostly Ubisoft's fucking fault. But I can't deny the shit behind that.

camoclock is a great man

#801
July 31, 2009, 01:50:51 PM
Quote from: TequilaClock;1634671Actually, it's mostly Ubisoft's fucking fault. But I can't deny the shit behind that.

I'm pretty sure the motion controls were the least of Red Steel's downsides
poop

PirateClock

#802
July 31, 2009, 01:52:56 PM
The motion thing could have worked if they weren't relying so heavily on it, they sacrificed way to much graphic and processing power in the process. Would the Wii have had similar specs to the 360 and ps3 AND the whole motion stuff, then it would have been an awesome console.. as it is now.. it's "family fun"..a term that brings despair into the hearts of real gamers.
_pirate_butchcavities (20:29:15): FUCK CLOCKS _pirate_

Poltergeist

#804
August 19, 2009, 05:05:54 PM
Quote from: Jefferson Twilight;1634677The motion thing could have worked if they weren't relying so heavily on it, they sacrificed way to much graphic and processing power in the process. Would the Wii have had similar specs to the 360 and ps3 AND the whole motion stuff, then it would have been an awesome console.. as it is now.. it's "family fun"..a term that brings despair into the hearts of real gamers.

lol

Marlin Clock

#805
August 19, 2009, 05:24:11 PM
The atmosphere really is what makes that game great.

It's also what made me only able to play it an hour or less at a time.

EtchASketchClock

#806
August 19, 2009, 05:27:41 PM
What Nintendo didn't tell you is that the Wii is actually an exercise machine for fatties, not a game console.
Take Care... Spike Your Hair!
[FLASH=http://files.myfrogbag.com/y10np3/Newsigthatworks.swf]width=400 height=200 wmode=transparent[/FLASH]

Poltergeist

#809
August 26, 2009, 03:51:35 PM
Viewtiful Joe motherfuckers.

SchnozzberryClock

#810
August 28, 2009, 09:16:02 PM
He also does follow-up articles every Friday.

This week he's giving a thorough explanation as to why internet memes need to die.

PirateClock

#811
August 29, 2009, 07:31:01 AM
Quote from: Mr. Super Awesome Man;1655574This week: A hoedown on 2.5D games
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/892-2-5D-Hoedown

Haha i liked the second part, i have beaten tons of bosses and puzzles with the thought in my head "there's no fucking way the developer intended it like this"
_pirate_butchcavities (20:29:15): FUCK CLOCKS _pirate_

AstronautClock

#813
September 02, 2009, 11:45:47 AM
I didnt really like the irish accent

Marlin Clock

#815
September 02, 2009, 04:15:45 PM
I don't think Snake is Irish.

Poltergeist

#816
September 02, 2009, 05:18:39 PM
I loved the third Monkey Island :(

Munglai

#817
September 02, 2009, 05:23:07 PM
Quote from: Poltergeist;1660147I loved the third Monkey Island :(

Me too but he is right that it's a big step away from the first two. It's not necessarily a bad step but it does kind of disregard the others.

Apparently Dave Gilbert had planned the Monkey Island series as a trilogy and had a story that legitimately followed the end of the second game but he got kicked out before he got to make it. A lot of the DIE HARD FANS reject Monkey Island 3 because of that even though it's still a nice game in its own right.

Poltergeist

#818
September 02, 2009, 06:05:36 PM
Are you talking about the new monkey islands or the third one? I thought it looked perfectly lovely, to be honest, but yeah, the newer episodes are ugly as sin.

Munglai

#819
September 02, 2009, 06:48:49 PM
Quote from: RibsClock;1660161I had a hard time liking monkey island 3, partially for the reason that Yahtzee stated regarding the difference in style from the glorious pixel masterpiece to the cartoonish style (which admittedly having become an animator has made me appreciate a little more) and partially because...well, it just seemed like a different character, a different game, I probably would have loved it to death if it wasn't supposed to be Monkey Island.

It's like, hey you know I love making new friends, but when you go to the airport to meet this friend you haven't seen in a long time and someone comes out wearing your friend's name tag it doesn't matter if they're a perfectly cool guy in all other regards.

As for this new guy...boy he's ugly, and he smells bad too. I don't think I want to shake his hand, because I don't want to associate the fond memories of my friend with this new guy's stink.

Pretty much yeah. Thankfully I was too young when I played the third one to really mind the change so I grew up liking both of them. I replayed Monkey Island 2 recently though and it is seriously the best one ever. I loved the silliness of the third one but it just can't stand up to the additional dark elements in the second.

The third one sure has lovely design though eh.
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