Brief reviews of movies you saw recently

[DigitalLemonClock]

you can hook me up ya?

email the dude himself  

[Munglai]

Constantine
Terrible dialogue, what seems like little effort to stay true to the comic (though I've only read sporadic issues of the Hellblazer comics and hated the first few dozen), sub-par performances all round with way too much melodramatically whispered dialogue and Keanu Reeves just looking like crap all over. Still it's one of those crappy, easy to watch movies like the Blade series or the Mummy movies. The only thing I did love about this movie was Tilda Swinton. Great performance and casting choice regardless of the material.

I really liked how they showed Satan though. Makes a change from all the suave goateed guys with sleek white suits.

[StrangeClock]

ya, the movie had some individual things I liked, like the portrayal of Satan. And the buffalos or whatever they were dropping dead when the guy with the spear passed by, even though it made little sense.

Narnia
hmmm hmmm alright. Tame, fairly predictable. I have yet to read the Lion, the Witch and Wardrobe, but I'm assuming it's not written in this rather obvious format (piece of shit brother nearly gets himself killed as redemption, but everyone saw that coming a mile away because of the magical potion the girl got). The whole crucifixion analogy felt kind of thrust in my face too. Plus the children were very, very ugly. At any rate, nice visuals and I like James Macavoy (the fawn).

[AdrenalineClock]

That centaur was a fucking badass.

[Losperman]

Narnia
hmmm hmmm alright. Tame, fairly predictable. I have yet to read the Lion, the Witch and Wardrobe, but I'm assuming it's not written in this rather obvious format (piece of shit brother nearly gets himself killed as redemption, but everyone saw that coming a mile away because of the magical potion the girl got). The whole crucifixion analogy felt kind of thrust in my face too. Plus the children were very, very ugly. At any rate, nice visuals and I like James Macavoy (the fawn).

I agree. And you notice how women are nearly useless in the movie? They both get weapons and between them, they only use it once. Although that scene (the bow shot) is my favorite part of the movie. Only because of the reaction of the person shot at.

Tristan and Isolde - 5/10

Average. Very average. Everything seemed so familiar. The characters, the themes, the dialogue, etc. There were some greats shots and scenery, but not enough to save the plot. And I was a bit confused as to why we were supposed to feel sorry for the conquering country rather than the native people (other than the king) who were having their land invaded. Most of the acting was good, but I can't stand James Franco. Horrible actor hired for his apparent good looks.

[chocolatechipclock]

The Godfather - 10/10

Being the huge movie fan I am, it's amazing I haven't seen this before.  But I'm glad I did.  It was a great movie.

Shaolin Soccer - 9.5/10

This movie is goddamn hilarious.  It's basicly a parody of all sports movies, kind of what Shawn of the Dead was to zombie horror.  This movie is one of the funniest I've seen in a long time.  Great stuff, go rent it now.

[StrangeClock]

I agree. And you notice how women are nearly useless in the movie? They both get weapons and between them, they only use it once. Although that scene (the bow shot) is my favorite part of the movie. Only because of the reaction of the person shot at.

Haha, yeah. Near the end of the movie I was like "now that I think of it, she hasn't shot a single arrow in bat- oh, there it is. And at about six feet distance. Bravo." The Ice Queen and her dwarf were cool though.

[AdrenalineClock]

Well, how good of an archer do you expect her to be after a couple days?  Excusing that idiotic scene where the two girls hit the target like they were pros, of course.

[Losperman]

Well, how good of an archer do you expect her to be after a couple days?  Excusing that idiotic scene where the two girls hit the target like they were pros, of course.

Yet somehow Peter became a master swordsman, able to slice through groups of experienced fighters like they were nothing. I actually just watched the movie again an hour ago and I can't get over how they portray women in it.

[Joey 56465468]

Yet somehow Peter became a master swordsman, able to slice through groups of experienced fighters like they were nothing. I actually just watched the movie again an hour ago and I can't get over how they portray women in it.

Personaly the only character I liked was the Centuar general.  The scene with him and the rhino was the only part I really liked.

[Masquatto]

Thank you for Smoking: 4.5/5. Very funny. For whatever reason, it seemed to be missing something, but all in all it's definitely worth seeing.

United 93: 2/5. If you've seen "The Flight That Faught Back," don't see this movie. I'd already seen that Discovery channel docu-drama that was more interesting, so it wasn't too enjoyable for me. I'm sure people who are easily touched by "inspired movies" will like it. It was just iffy for me.

Scary Movie 4: 3/5. Not as funny as 1 or 3, but still alright. Meh.

V for Vendetta: 5/5. Enjoyed it very much. Worth seeing. End.

[StrangeClock]

One Night At McCool's
When I first saw this movie in stores, I thought it'd just be some lame romantic comedy crap from seeing the cover. Then my brother rented it and I grudgingly sat down to watch it. It's actually a really funny movie with some great characters. Paul Reiser is fantastic as a pervert lawyer and the ending scene is hilarious.

[Barquis]

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy 7.8/10


This movie was pretty funny, but it didn't entirely seem that it tried too hard. The apathetic Marvin made me laugh several times, as well as when the sperm whale smashed into the ground (the bowl of petunias must apparently be an inside joke that I don't get). And in several places throughout the movie, the ridiculous bureacracy of we Americans was demonstrated by the bumbling Vorgon alien type things.


P.S. Whoever was casted as the voice of the guide itself was well fit to that part.

[Arctic]

Walk the Line - 8/10
I liked it a lot, but it resembled any other musician's story put to film.  Nothing really creative was done with his life in this film. They introduced his future love early and made sure it was plastered in your head that there would be something going on between the two.

Revolver - 8/10
There are points when you can tell it's a Guy Ritchie movie and other times you're just wondering what the fuck.  I still don't understand half the shit, and why they used cartoon shaded 3d at that one particular scene.  I liked it, yet I really didn't.  Guess I'll have to watch it again.

[chocolatechipclock]

Snatch - 7/10

Direction and editing were brilliant, but I felt that the writing wasn't too good.  It was cool visual candy, but the plot didn't really appeal to me.  Not a bad film, though.

[StrangeClock]

The Butterfly Effect
Damn. I take back... nearly all the bad things I've said about Ashton Kutcher. Fantastic movie.

I thought it was kind of funny at first that the kid Tommy was such a badass, he looked like he walked right out of the Goonies. But he did command respect when he messed up that guy in the movie theater.

[Roman Collar Clock]

Narnia
hmmm hmmm alright. Tame, fairly predictable. I have yet to read the Lion, the Witch and Wardrobe, but I'm assuming it's not written in this rather obvious format (piece of shit brother nearly gets himself killed as redemption, but everyone saw that coming a mile away because of the magical potion the girl got). The whole crucifixion analogy felt kind of thrust in my face too. Plus the children were very, very ugly. At any rate, nice visuals and I like James Macavoy (the fawn).

Trust me, the book's way better.  Peter doesn't act like a simpering pussy like he does in the movie during the first fight scenes.

[chocolatechipclock]

Dog Day Afternoon - 10/10

This is the best damn heist movie I've ever seen.  Pacino really steals the stage here.  It's hard to imagine that this was based on a true story with all the crazy twists throughout the movie.  At times, the movie is very thrilling, and others it's hilarious.  It's excellent stuff.  Go rent it.

[Sharp Clock]

Get Rich Or Die Tryin - 6/10
My cop friend wanted to see this movie because of all the shootings caused by it in the greater washington area. And halfway through the movie you will feel like shooting someone too, and not completely because the movie sucks. The movie is actually quite entertaining though it realy glorifies the character of 50 cent. You almost can't help but idenitify with or atleast understand the posistions that 50 cent lives through. Also the movie shows a nice progression in the devolopment of the main character as he grows up.  If you are drinking a 40 of steel reserve and feel like being gangster it is worth a rent.

Butterfly Effect - 7/10
A enjoyable time travelling movie, that alters the realities of time travel. If you change your history and did not live your past 13 some years of life then you wouldn't remeber that you time traveled at all. (though i have never time traveled so i could be wrong)

[StrangeClock]

Trust me, the book's way better.  Peter doesn't act like a simpering pussy like he does in the movie during the first fight scenes.

ah yes, I couldn't help but laugh when Aslan named Peter "Wolfsbane" just because the wolf JUMPED INTO HIS SWORD. Plus when he said "Peter... clean your sword" I mentally added "but do it off camera. Age ratings. You know how it is."