Finding pussy is hard as fuck

[WimpyClock]

I haven't gotten laid in 3 years and my dick smells inexcusably bad because of it. I make sure to wash my hands frequently to ward off the odor but alas my dick scum cuts through my efforts like a knife through butter.
If I had the chance to fuck you'd be damned sure I would be more ferocious than a tiger and jackhammer the mouth, poon, anus, or any available orafice I could get the chance to but I have given up hope. I am but a smelly dicked faggot
In my childhood and the lengthly discoveries that have resulted from constantly contemplating it over and over, I have made several deductions and diagrams as to WHY my current lonesome meaningless situation prolongs indefinitely. Here are a few examples
1. I am not particularly handsome. It I'd true that in my youth I gathered a few MySpace compliments and even once had a an extended engagement with a female... But those days have passed. NO longer am I the bright. Eyed youth of fair skin and brilliant posture I used to know. Now I am a tuckered and useless fatso. Weighing at least 300 pounds.
2. I am actually very handsome and simply under appreciated. This too seems likely as I have masturbated in front of a mirror successfully a few times.
3 . All women are actually vampires and the fact that I smell like garlic wards them away. This point needs no explanation.
Alas. I am still alone and will continue to be so for quite some time.

[EnglishClock]

1. Now I am a tuckered and useless fatso. Weighing at least 300 pounds.

May I just give you the best piece of advice I know about this, which is that you should eat several small meals throughout the day, instead of having 3 large meals. Your metabolism will speed up and you'll lose weight, as long as you don't just eat carbs and sugar. You'll also have loads more energy which feels awesome. This video explains why its harder to avoid sugar if you eat gigantic meals.


[U2]amn8d_KBVZ8[/U2]

[PhantomCatClock]

I'd say it is comparable, probably on par, with fuck.

[MonsterMunch]

[WimpyClock]

i haven't slept in 3 days because of work and wimpy clock I

[buttplug]

just got back from chillin with a girl, got my dick wet in a cornfield sup clockcrew

[Sinister Clock]

I don't know how someone's dick can smell bad in general. I mean, isn't it socially forced upon you to shower/bathe every day?

[AbsintheClock]

I came over because I heard there was another thread about dicks.

[Slurpee]

I don't know how someone's dick can smell bad in general. I mean, isn't it socially forced upon you to shower/bathe every day?

you would think so but here we are in a world full of stank ass

[FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK]

I put a plastic bag over my dick so it doesnt get clean when I shower.

[TropicanaClock]

wimpy wears a hard hat when he fucks

[WimpyClock]

wimpy wears a hard hat when he fucks

I'm a working man.

[DiscoBallClock]

I wear my dick as a scarf