I apologize.

[DeadTreeClock]

Hey guys,

I'm here to face the jury, so to speak. This is a really difficult thing to do, because I always hoped that when I finally did it, I'd be able to in the light of setting things straight. LumpClock and I had a great conversation that convinced me that I shouldn't wait for the ââ,¬Å"perfectââ,¬Â time.

For years since my mom suddenly passed away, I've struggled with really severe depression. It's made it really fucking hard for me to make a living and put food on my own table, on top of having to deal with legal obligations related to both of my parents and my mom's parents, all of which passed away in a pretty short period of time.

I spent a lot of time selling things that belonged to them to clean up their messes and make ends meet. At one point, I sold something valuable that was in my family for a long time. I fucked up by sending it via USPS without any tracking or insurance, thinking it would be fine. When it didn't get where it was going, the PayPal dispute sucked the life out of my account, which I was stupidly using alongside the Clock Crew's money. It's fucking stupid and it's 100% my fault.

I've perpetually been in a state of it seeming nearly impossible for me to put food on my own table and take care of myself. My financial situation sucks. I've interviewed for all kinds of jobs and repeatedly been told that I wasn't a good fit. My mental state has been shit, without family or friends to help me figure anything out. Certainly I've had no help figuring out my depression and my legal obligations. I've had no insurance for years and any medical problems I have just come out of my own pocket, which is virtually empty most of the time.

It's been the worst for me, and to top it off, I've felt guilty the whole time because I'm not good enough to fix my stupid mistake here. I never felt like I could show my face here without being ridiculed, unless I was immediately prepared to set things straight by making a SURPRISE! I FIXED IT announcement. And even if I could I still expected to be hated and ridiculed for my stupid mistakes.

Shame is the real name of the game here. I'm ashamed of my mistake and the way it hurt a community that I loved giving my time to. I'm ashamed of the circumstances that put me in a situation of living from eBay auction to eBay auction and even then, being barely able to make ends meet and move on with my life. I'm ashamed of not having a family to spend holidays with, or to encourage me when I struggle with this shit over and over again.

Since the beginning of this year, things have looked up a little for me. I've had some great freelancing clients that have helped me take care of myself, put food on my table, cover my expenses. I have had some promising interviews and other job prospects on the horizon.

I talked with PatriotClock and we're going to talk more about ââ,¬Å"replacing the treasury through installment payments or something of the sort. Really anything would be a sign of a serious desire for forgiveness.ââ,¬Â When I work that out with them, I will tell you all the details myself and let you know how I'll be held accountable for everything start to finish.

I never wanted to fuck this up. I made stupid mistakes at a time in my life when everything was falling apart. It would've been better to never have touched anything financial for you guys in the first place, which was also my mistake.

Any ridicule or hate I get, I probably deserve, and I don't expect to be very liked here even when things do get worked out, and that doesn't matter because I want to set my wrongs right however I can, however long it takes and whatever I need to do, no matter what anyone says to me about my past.

I also apologize for anything I said that gave any of you the impression that I was taking credit for your work. I'm just proud of the things I was able to be a part of here, and I hoped that pride would help me stand out to a good company, and help me get myself into a position that would let me set things straight here. I'll just strike my work here from the record and find another way to talk about the things I think I'm good at. I don't deserve to be able to associate myself with this place anymore, I've thoroughly un-earned it.

I didn't imagine my life going the way that it did, and I'm sorry that I've deprived you guys of an important resource because of my mistake.

[AMPM]

[OcarinaClock]

[Sinister Clock]

The apology is empty at the moment, but as the empty money pit fills, so does the sorry pot.

[DeadTreeClock]

The apology is empty at the moment, but as the empty money pit fills, so does the sorry pot.

Of course. I'm not looking for forgiveness, which may or may not come. Just to do the right thing as I am able, and I expect nothing from anyone in the meantime or even after the fact.

[Losperman]

Given that you seemed like a pretty good guy why I Internet-knew you back in the day, I am going to take your word on what you've said. I've skirted the issues you've had in my own life, and I know how crushing those kinds of things can be on a personal level. So I'm sorry for everything you've had to go through and I would have likely exiled myself in the same situation. It really does say a lot that you were willing to come back here knowing the kind of response to expect.

{{{Tree}}}

[VuBawlsClock]

If only money grew on Tree

[I1I1I1I1I1I1I11111I1I1I1IIIIIII1I1I1I1I11I]

[U2]rasZzenuYxI[/U2]

[AbsintheClock]

Well I'll go ahead and say it here. The years that I knew you I thought we were pretty close. Hell at one point I had even thought about sharing an apartment with you, and that was right around after your mother had passed away. We've had a lot of talks about a lot of different shit, and when people were ready to put your head on a pike I stuck up for you. It felt pretty shitty to have to go after you on facebook just to ask about the money, and it felt even shittier when you had me deleted and blocked after all those years of knowing you just because I had asked. I would have helped you out if you had just said something, but now it's probably going to take more to gain back my trust. And more than just making monthly payments. If you want to talk more, my screen name on AIM is still the same after all these years. I've since deleted the facebook though.

[Slurpee]

thatt's OK I forgive you :slurpeebutt:

[NintendoClock]

we all know the REAL reason why you took that money.

I for one am super appreciative. You are forgiven in my book.

I also nominate tree for smod.

[EnglishClock]

I practice buddhism and of course I forgive you. Just don't be an arsehole ever again in your life and I would appreciate that.

[AstronautClock]

I practice buddhism and of course I forgive you. Just don't be an arsehole ever again in your life and I would appreciate that.

more like butthism

[Sinister Clock]

One of my roommates stole a whole box of my dishwasher tablets but I don't know who it is, so I guess I'll take it out on Tree.

[pop-tart]

My name is VuBooshCup. I've never made a mistake in my life. So I will judge this man even though I joined about the after he left.

I will pay $1 toward your debt for every flash movie you make about me. This is a limited time offer so do work son.

[AmberArachnidClock]

If all this is true then that really sounds awful, I can't imagine going through that without a support system. Everyone makes mistakes and frankly you could have made a lot worse of one. That said, I hope you continue to fight so that you can have a stable living arrangement someday, and when you do, a thousand bucks shouldn't be too big of a deal in monthly installments or whatever.

[Sinister Clock]

If all this is true then that really sounds awful, I can't imagine going through that without a support system. Everyone makes mistakes and frankly you could have made a lot worse of one. That said, I hope you continue to fight so that you can have a stable living arrangement someday, and when you do, a thousand bucks shouldn't be too big of a deal in monthly installments or whatever.

Who are you?

[Lump Clock]

I am glad you've made your return. Let it be known that on this day Tree took his first steps toward reparations, and ultimately redemption. Time to get back to your roots, Joe. My AIM is accurate, message me sometime for talkings.

[Sinister Clock]

[U2]Q8Tiz6INF7I[/U2]
pay back the money and hit the road jack

fuck you and your autoplay.

[pop-tart]

fuck you and your autoplay.

Good point.