Stupid thing you did when you were younger

[VCRClock]

In about second grade I managed to accidentally crash my bike into a parked Cadillac.

I think I put a slice of cheese in the VCR.

Oh, so that was YOU. Fuck you.

That actually reminds me... I used to put credit cards in heater vents and once slipped a mortgage statement under the TV which was apparently pretty catastrophic.

[coalclock]

In about second grade I managed to accidentally crash my bike into a parked Cadillac.

I had a mate in highschool that used to get hit by cars all the time, Once he was sitting on a curb and still got hit by a car trying to park, So when he walked into a parked car he never lived it down.

[Schwep]

I have a problem where I say stuff out loud when I shouldn't. Once I was standing next to someone who just made me a cake and I said "I hope that's not my birthday cake. Once, after getting in trouble for something I didn't do (that happened to me nearly every day) I said "Fucking bitch" in the hall when I knew there was a teacher right behind me. She didn't do anything about it. Once, when I was about 9, I called the principle a fatso (I was nine) when she already never believed me when I said I didn't do the stuff the I'm a edgy teen kid kept saying I did. Once, I was about 6, I saw a little bubble container on the floor (like the ones you get from quarter machines) with something in it that was soft and made of something along the lines cotton in the clothing aisle and picked it up thinking someone got it from a quarter machine and dropped it so I took it and when we got out of the store and dad saw me holding it he told me it was women's underwear or something like that (I can't remember for sure).

[Solenoidclock]

Attaboy miraclefruit.


Uh.. I was in my moms car when I was like 6-7 and I took the parking brake off and it was on a hill I almost flew off the edge of a mountain but a tree was there. Pahah.

I did something similar when I was six. It was my family reunion, and I was in the driver's seat of my uncle's mobile home playing with the equipment. There were about twenty drunk relatives sitting around in there with me, and we were parked at the top of a very steep, very long driveway. I shifted from park to neutral and the whole party launched down the driveway, plowed through my grandfather's garage, and landed sideways in the backyard. Everyone piled out the back window, no injuries, and I went to bed that day thinking that I had figured out how to drive.

Also, some asshat that was supposed to be watching me tried to deny his own stupidity, and my mom punched him in the dick.

[coalclock]

Also, some asshat that was supposed to be watching me tried to deny his own stupidity, and my mom punched him in the dick.

I wish your mom would punch me in the dick

[FileCabinetClock]

one time I told someone to suck my dick when I was like 7
oooops

[SamFisherKlawk]

I'm guessing your dad was some kind of psycho-killer?

hehe, no.

[Jim Gaffigan]

5. Tortyred a friend once. Made him eat grass, cut his penis with thorns and made him go in to the store with his pants and underware down.

Holy shit.

[Moose Clock]

Holy shit.

Teamwork.

[buttplug]

My God I am glad I was raised Catholic.
I don't see how you guys could hurt and steal from your friends like that.

[VCRClock]

My God I am glad I was raised Catholic.
I don't see how you guys could hurt and steal from your friends like that.

Do you want your wallet back?

[buttplug]

Do you want your wallet back?

I don't know what you are getting at, but when I was around 8, I found some kids wallet. I turned it over to my dad. Later the kid came by asking about a wallet. When I gave it to him, he gave me a dollar. I was so happy.

[FileCabinetClock]

I don't know what you are getting at, but when I was around 8, I found some kids wallet. I turned it over to my dad. Later the kid came by asking about a wallet. When I gave it to him, he gave me a dollar. I was so happy.

that's a nice story

[DWARFINATORclock]

Sometimes when I'm drunk I accidentaly grab a girls tit when I don't mean to, like when I talk to her and want to put my hand on her side or something. Alcohol kills your coordination.

[DWARFINATORclock]

One time I pissed on someone.

Oh right, I pissed on my share of people.

One time in a bar I was pissing in a urinal when two of my friends came in and started shoving eachother, one of the shoved me so I turned around and pissed all over his pants. That's what you get for fucking with me while I'm taking a piss, asshole.

[DWARFINATORclock]

I actually do a lot more stupid shit now I just realised. I'm just a magnet for stupid shit. Oh the stories I could tell.

[GodClock]

i used to jump down my stairs kuz i felt like superman.

[Moose Clock]

i used to jump down my stairs kuz i felt like superman.

Your name should be Gawd clock.

[IvysaurClock]

i used to jump down my stairs kuz i felt like superman.

I did that too, but Power Rangers was my influence. Damnit I loved Power Rangers.

[GodClock]

I did that too, but Power Rangers was my influence. Damnit I loved Power Rangers.

power rangers was my influence to rescue this toy i had from a high drawer and i jumped to get it and gashed my head on the corner