Brief reviews of movies you saw recently

[SilverCherryClock]

Poseidon (the new one) 3/10

A pretty lame movie, even it's neat special effects couldn't save it from being bad. The plot was terribly predictable (I actually picked out who would die half way through the movie  and was right except for the old homosexual who lived) and the characters were uninteresting and cliched. All the deaths that you thought would be so dramatic never were, which you'd think would be refreshing but it really just makes the movie worse. I've never watched the old one, but I'm sure you should watch that one instead.

[Munglai]

Naturally!

They had M Nighty Night down for directing the Life of Pi film for a while but then Jean-Pierre Jeaunet who's a billion times more awesome took over instead. Apparently M Night Shymalan decided not to do it because he felt he was being labeled as a TWIST GUY and Life of Pi has a big twist to it. I'm glad he decided not to because it's not really a twist at all and he would completely rape all the subtlety out of it.

[Hate Clock]

They had M Nighty Night down for directing the Life of Pi film for a while but then Jean-Pierre Jeaunet who's a billion times more awesome took over instead. Apparently M Night Shymalan decided not to do it because he felt he was being labeled as a TWIST GUY and Life of Pi has a big twist to it. I'm glad he decided not to because it's not really a twist at all and he would completely rape all the subtlety out of it.

Also he's one of the worst directors of our decade.

[Munglai]

Also he's one of the worst directors of our decade.

See I don't think he's that bad a director but he is a pretty awful writer.

[Hate Clock]

See I don't think he's that bad a director but he is a pretty awful writer.

Either way, considering the direction his career is going right now, if he had directed Life of Pi it would probably be a piece of shit.  The M. Night curse is that each movie he puts out gets progressively worse.  Since Lady in the Water was utter garbage I can't even imagine what his next movie is going to be like.

[camoclock is a great man]

Either way, considering the direction his career is going right now, if he had directed Life of Pi it would probably be a piece of shit.  The M. Night curse is that each movie he puts out gets progressively worse.  Since Lady in the Water was utter garbage I can't even imagine what his next movie is going to be like.

Unbreakable Sixth Signs In The Water

The silly twist is that a geiser erupts when the baddie is standing on it.

[chocolatechipclock]

Last House on the Left - 8.5/10

This is a great 70's gore flick.  It's basicly about 2 hippie chicks that go to a stranger to "score some grass", as a matter of fact, an ounce of columbian weed for $20 (remember, this movie was released in 1972).  This movie works great as an anti-marijuana commercial.  

The supposed dealers they go to have no plans of selling grass.  They are kidnapped, taken to a forest, raped, tortured, and murdered.  All of this coincidently takes place across the street from the main character's home.  After killing the two girls, the killers ask if they can stay at the girl's parent's house, neither party knowing who the other really is, at least for a while...

My favorite thing about this movie is the soundtrack.  It is always happy and kind of reminds me of scooby-doo when the killers are chasing down the girls in the forest.  This movie is like no other horror I've seen.  Go check it out if you aren't disturbed easily.

[Randy Pearson]

Unbreakable Sixth Signs In The Water

The silly twist is that a geiser erupts when the baddie is standing on it.

I thought Unbreakable was an awesome movie. It really gives a great new spin on the superhero genre. I liked the Sixth Sense, it was the second of his movies where I didn't see the twist coming a mile away (the first being Unbreakable). The Village had a fantastic story and visual style, but the acting was so bland and horrible, I really expected better of Sigourney Weaver. I also like Signs very much, simply because it didn't really have a stupid twist at the end, and it was genuenly scary.

One bone I have to pick with him is that he constantly makes cameos in his movies. Even though Quentin Tarantino does it alot too, he does it with a certain sense of modesty, that only he could do that role. With Night it's why bother.

Speaking of Tarantino:

Kill Bill:

I am going to write about both volume one and two, because the director obviously meant it to be as one epic story. I enjoyed this film on a level that I don't think I can say for other action/black comedy films I've seen, let alone action. The acting is superb, you really feel like you get to know all the characters on an emotional level, even if they are a murdering bastard (I practically cried when Bill died at the end; Oh come on, like the title doesn't make the outcome obvious enough).

Fans of his past work will appreciate the fact that this film is split into chapters, not all taking place in chronological order, as he has done with his past films. But because we have a narration to go with it, the story is much easier to follow then, say, Pulp Fiction).

The way this film looks visually is also very unique. It's almost like we're watching an old sixties or seventies action show. Even some of the little actual score that appears in the film sounds like the campy, over-exagerated tv show music we would expect from back then.

The story and direction are so strange that you can't help but enjoy yourself, even in the ultra-violent fight (or just plain slaughter) scenes. The film is shown in an ultra-modern setting, but told as a japanese comic book, but directed in the sixties tv style mixed with the look that is so distinctly Tarantinos. Even a whole 15 minutes of the film is done in anime form, showing that Tarantino is still the enciecopedia of pop-culture he was before. Multiple genres are also thrown in for good measure: sphaggeti western, italian giello, japanese/chinese fantasy epic, etc.

Fans of Lady Snowblood will immediately recognise the similar look of the first part of this film to the earlier, especially during the battle with Oren-Ishi. Bruce Lee fans will be pleased to see that the outfit the Bride wears is a go-go disco version of the outfit he wore in his uncompleted film: The Game of Death.

At the end of the films, we see an end credit very similar to old action films, showing the actor in one scene and then listing the character they played. There is also a second end credit sequence for the actors done in the style of the opening credits for a fifties film, and then the actual end credits (don't worry, it looks too good to be boring).

If there is any flaw with the film, it is that when we get to the volume two part, we find it hard to believe we are watching the same story, the style and look are so different.

In the end, Tarantino has once again made a fantastic film, one too keep old fans, new fans, and regular viewers alike entertained. I may even watch it again, I most likely will, I definetly will, it's just so enjoyable.

9.9/10

[ChocolateCoffin]

Little Miss Sunshine - 9/10

Great ,great movie. Go watch it right now.

[Jimmy McNulty]

Aliens: 9.5/10
James Cameroon delivers one kick ass, balls to the wall, edge of your motherfucking seat, damn good sequel of a movie. It isn't the horror movie Alien was, but it's the scifi-action film that everything else strives to be. Although it departs from alien in direction style, it bears the many of the same traits. Vibrant characters, badass sets, and our faviorite acid bleeding friend, Harry Q. Xenomorph. Also, Vasquez and Apone are fucking badass.

[LeekClock]

Everything is Illuminated 1.5/5
 
Liev Schreiber tries his hand at writing and directing, and as far as i'm concerned, fails.
 
I really disliked the writing style. It was like a bad american sitcom to begin with. Somewhere in the middle it devolved further from a poor "finding-oneself" comedy into a poor "dealing-with-war" drama.
 
The story was not in the least compelling. None of the characters are very likable (nor could one relate to them very well) aside from the grandfather, but the story is so dumb that I was filled with a whitewash hatred for everything about it. Even though I quite liked the photography.
 
Also, personally, from a language student's point of view, I disliked the way he handled the Ukranian character's pidgin English. It wasn't very believable.

[chocolatechipclock]

Dawn of the Dead (original) 9/10

Great gore, action, and pretty smart, too.  It's nice to see an old horror movie where they don't kill off the black guy.  Other than the grotesquely large walkie-talkies, it felt like a pretty modern movie.  I liked it a lot more than the new Dawn of the Dead.  This is one of my favorite zombie movies now.

[cokezeroglock]

Poseidon Adventure (the new one) 10/10
I saw it on an aeroplane, and I was actualy listening to a Jazz station, and it is extremely funny looking at the ship sinking and such while listening to some light Chicago Jazz.

[LeekClock]

. It's nice to see an old horror movie where they don't kill off the black guy.

I think there's an alternate ending in which he does die
 
But not until the end

[Arctic]

Malcolm X - 8/10

I'm running out of things to watch.

[SilverCherryClock]

Poseidon Adventure (the new one) 10/10
I saw it on an aeroplane, and I was actualy listening to a Jazz station, and it is extremely funny looking at the ship sinking and such while listening to some light Chicago Jazz.

That movie is so awful I can't believe you didn't burst into flames when you gave it a 10/10

[Hate Clock]

The Science of Sleep- 2/5

The main character was incredibly unlikable and impossible to relate to and the plot was nearly non-existent.  Honestly 90% of the movie seemed like the writer masturbating and the other 10 percent was Michel Gondry going, "Hey wouldn't it be cool if..."  The movie left me feeling unsatisfied.  Nothing was at stake and nothing was accomplished.  There were some interesting visuals but other than that I didn't like it.

Eternal Sunshine was better.

[Jimmy McNulty]

Akira: 10/10
Probably the best animated movie (anime or otherwise) I've ever seen. Flat out incredible. The animation was incredible, the music was incredible, the setting was incredible etc.[/rave review]

[Losperman]

Employee of the Month - 3/10

I was amazed at the amount of jokes that fell flat in this movie. Not only that, but the fact that they kept using the same make-fun-of-the-fat-people or someone-gets-hurt joke over and over. The three points I gave it break down as follows: 1 for one of Jessica Simpson's breasts. 2 for the other breast. 3 for a funny anal joke. And that's about it.

[AdrenalineClock]

Employee of the Month - 3/10

I was amazed at the amount of jokes that fell flat in this movie. Not only that, but the fact that they kept using the same make-fun-of-the-fat-people or someone-gets-hurt joke over and over. The three points I gave it break down as follows: 1 for one of Jessica Simpson's breasts. 2 for the other breast. 3 for a funny anal joke. And that's about it.

I still don't get why they thought a movie starring two non-actors was a good idea.

The Science of Sleep- 2/5

The main character was incredibly unlikable and impossible to relate to and the plot was nearly non-existent.  Honestly 90% of the movie seemed like the writer masturbating and the other 10 percent was Michel Gondry going, "Hey wouldn't it be cool if..."  The movie left me feeling unsatisfied.  Nothing was at stake and nothing was accomplished.  There were some interesting visuals but other than that I didn't like it.

Eternal Sunshine was better.

Gondry wrote it, so the WHOLE movie is him masturbating.  He needs Kaufman to write his movies.