Worst movies you have ever seen

[Palm Clock]

leprechaun's 1 - 4.
especially "Leprechaun 4: Leprechaun in Space" <- serious title

[salt]

Hitman
Jumper
Kate and Leopald
Spiderman 3

probably some more

[Palm Clock]

i liked jumper

[MonsterMunch]

fuck you i nearly got lynched before for saying this but i will say it again.

i hated army of darkness. execpt for the stop motion skeletons, ok. but the rest sucked.

Fuck you, no seriously, fuck you!

[RobertSmithClock]

red eye

[ChimeClock]

the outsiders.
i mean, come on.

i read the book in 8th grade

also dungeons and dragons

[Slurpee]

Dead Clowns.

I've watched a lot of bad movies. My friends and I kind of do it for fun. There are bad movies like The Covenant, Pulse, Meet the Spartans and Ultraviolet, that are obnoxiously I'm a edgy teen, bad movies that get major releases, and while they're fucking atrocious, there's really no comparison.
There are bad movie classics; things that got riffed on MST3k, like Plan 9, and Manos: The Hands of Fate. Dead Clowns will never be one of those movies.
There're good bad movies, like Tommy Wiseau's The Room, Killer Klowns From Outer Space, the Evil Dead Trilogy, or Maximum Overdrive. (Army of Darkness being the exception. That movie was fucking fantastic, and there's nothing unintentionally bad in the entire glorious thing.) Dead Clowns is not one of those movies.
And there're completely embarrassing train-wrecks that are actually a chore to watch, like Bone Sickness, Death Tunnel, or Wedding Slashers. (You haven't heard of these unless you spend a lot of time at the "Shitty" wrack at your local video rental store.) Dead Clowns is not any of those movies, either.

Dead Clowns is, by a wide margin, the single worst, mostly obnoxiously in-your-face horrible movie I have ever seen in my entire life, to the point that the other movies I've mentioned here are a solid watchable afternoon of entertainment.
Even where movies like Death Tunnel swallow themselves whole in a completely incomprehensible gibbering mess of a plot, and movies like Bone Sickness are apparently filmed entirely on a circa 1994 home video camera and converted from VHS to DVD by a high school AV crew, and movies like Wedding Slashers fill a staggering amount of the movie with improvised dialogue that can barely be heard over the sound of diegetic wind, Dead Clowns fails spectacularly to reach even these highs of low-budget, amateur production values. The entire movie is a 95 minute exercise endurance test in tedium, from an insanely I'm a edgy teen, not-even-slightly-audible exposition taking place in an unlit car interior in the pouring rain between some goth guy who fails to do anything in the way of acting and some goth girl who follows suit in a fantastically irritating manner, to the constant repetition of a cycle of the not-even-half-hearted .1 mph gait of the "dead clowns" themselves as the victims sit perfectly still for ~8 minutes at a time with "fear" on their face while completely failing to scream even once in the entire movie before quickly turning into a pile of mannequin parts wrapped around meat (To be fair, it certainly isn't hokey-looking gore. That might have accidently made it entertaining.) for the clowns to lazily chew on for an additional 5 minutes. (This may not sound like much, but try sitting through it.)
A number of similar-looking, meandering, pointless characters that not even an autistic could possibly care about exhibit small traces of personality traits that could be interesting, if executed by filmmakers with an iota of talent, lengthly (10-15 minute) expositional scenes that serve such purposes as "giving the nerd on the drug trip a fire extinguisher." (I've never taken cocaine myself, but something tells me even bad cocaine trips don't usually entail being hallucinogenically assaulted by bad actors in zombie clown make-up, even when there are, coincidentally, bad actors in zombie clown make-up assaulting people in the real world.) Stock hurricane footage is peppered throughout to stretch the run time to "slightly longer than the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie," and to constantly remind the viewer why nobody is leaving their house even under threat of being eaten by clowns. (I think. The dead clowns, and also several characters at times, seem to have no trouble moving from building to building.) (The filmmakers also seem to be under the impression that the hurricane explains why nobody runs away from the clowns (who move with all the speed and menace of quadriplegic puppy.)) (parenthesis.)

I cannot stress enough how horrendously bad this movie is. I feel like it's punishment crafted specifically for me and my friends, for enjoying other, lesser bad movies. We actually walked to the video store to return it at around 11:30 at night just to get it away.

It also has the most spectacular lie of a DVD case ever.

Seeing this might convince you that the movie inside might be roughly Sci-Fi Channel Original-quality. It's not. You would actually be pressed to find a high school student video project of inferior quality.

You will not have fun watching this movie.
I was the Mayor of Fun Town before I watched this movie, and I didn't.

[d u m p y]

stuff

good lord i have to see this

[Slurpee]

good lord i have to see this

Please.

Not because you'll find any joy at all in doing so, but because I want somebody to confirm I wasn't exaggerating in the slightest.
I might have actually been understating what a terrible goddamned movie it is.


In fact you're probably even going to be disappointed if you're just looking for the worst movie ever made, and think it will be a clear-cut winner.
It's not. The awfulness of Dead Clowns is a slow-burn. It's so blandly bad that you can't even knee-jerk, "Oh wow this is really bad." That would be too satisfying.

[d u m p y]

Please.

Not because you'll find any joy at all in doing so, but because I want somebody to confirm I wasn't exaggerating in the slightest.
I might have actually been understating what a terrible goddamned movie it is.

that's why i want to see it,
to report back here.
we've got a dollar video here in town and they've got a room entirley dedicated to shitty horror films, most of which are rated R but i'm allowed to rent due to the fact that they suck that bad, and i'm sure i'll find it.
i'll get back to you next weekend, because it's a tradition me and my friend have to see a shit horror film every weekend

[BreadfruitClock]

I can't remember the title, but it was like "The thing", and it ruined my life.
I watched it about 3-4 years back, it was made by some unheard of company. It was about these 4 people in some low budget hotel room waiting for some package, within that package was a worm thing with patches for eyes (aka puppet). For one hour they all went around doing their own thing while this stupid worm thing talked each one into killing themself (i REALLY forget what happened, i guess he was messing with their mind or something) expect one girl who, get this, had sex with the damn thing for no apparent reason. While doing it, she removed the patches from the creatures eyes to reveal a hole with blood in it. This had nothing to do with anything, but i remember it because it confused the fuck out of me. I still wonder today why i watched that whole movie.

Edit: Its called "The Item"

[miracle fruit]

Beerfest

that was a cool movie, but super troopers was better

[miracle fruit]

Hitman
Jumper
Kate and Leopald
Spiderman 3

probably some more

what? these can't possible be the worst movies you've ever seen. they're just average

[MentosClock]

I can't remember the title, but it was like "The thing", and it ruined my life.
I watched it about 3-4 years back, it was made by some unheard of company. It was about these 4 people in some low budget hotel room waiting for some package, within that package was a worm thing with patches for eyes (aka puppet). For one hour they all went around doing their own thing while this stupid worm thing talked each one into killing themself (i REALLY forget what happened, i guess he was messing with their mind or something) expect one girl who, get this, had sex with the damn thing for no apparent reason. While doing it, she removed the patches from the creatures eyes to reveal a hole with blood in it. This had nothing to do with anything, but i remember it because it confused the fuck out of me. I still wonder today why i watched that whole movie.

I think that I have heard of this movie before, but I can't remember from where.

[salmonberryclock]

House on Haunted Hill

[salmonberryclock]

WAIT NO!
8 crazy nights
^the worst, ever

[SageClock]

Killer Klowns From Outer Space, the Evil Dead Trilogy, or Maximum Overdrive

These movies might be considered bad movie classics, but... I don't know if I'd call them bad necessarily. They're all pretty entertaining in their own way.

I thought "Dude, Where's My Car?" was the worst movie ever when I first saw it, although now I think I might appreciate its nonsensical stupidity and kinda want to see it again.

Epic Movie is probably my worst movie now. I watched it when a friend brought it in to work after renting it and I wanted to kill some time at work and was curious as to just how bad it was. I really shouldn't have bothered.

There's probably some other old stuff that would qualify also, but I can't think of them offhand.

[BreadfruitClock]

I think that I have heard of this movie before, but I can't remember from where.

Found it!

Its called "The Item"

Once agian, false advertising dvd cover.


Worst movie EVER.

[InterstateClock]

Cabin Fever

It's a really gross and just plain shitty movie. Ugh.

[Losperman]

Epic Movie is probably my worst movie now. I watched it when a friend brought it in to work after renting it and I wanted to kill some time at work and was curious as to just how bad it was. I really shouldn't have bothered.

Same here. I watched it while I was deployed because I ran out of other movies to watch and I regretted it. Well, I can't say that. I actually appreciated the new bar that it set for terrible movies. I think I cringed more at the flat jokes than I even thought about laughing while watching it.

Cabin Fever

It's a really gross and just plain shitty movie. Ugh.

I loved that movie. One of the better modern horror movies, in my opinion. But I do recognize that it has that love/hate kind of aura. I've never met anyone who was in the middle on it.