gary brolsma tank n spank

[PhantomCatClock]

plus what they never tell you in those movies is that if someone finds you before/during/after-but-not-too-late, any doctor involved is required by law to put you in an asylum for at least six months





which is also not as bad as the movies make it out to be. "Pajama prison" is accurate

[FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK]

I wish people would translate sega saturn games and not just snes or ps1 games. I'm always finding weird shit like this that I'll never get to play.

I'd like the Harmony award for best new page, please

this was the first thing I saw when I logged in thank you for that.

I'm not sure if I think this is great and hilarious and a concise metaphor for economic immobility, or if I think it's dumb and accomplishes exactly as much with games as a medium as me writing a four sentence joke on the same subject just did

probably the former, but I am getting older and wish to take the responsibility of becoming increasingly cynical and curmudgeonly as seriously as I flerm. I mean can.

no you're right I've read enough about that game to know it sucks. sacrificing fun for meaning ruins games if that's the ENTIRE game. but god damn the visual direction is good. it looks like a n64 game that never existed. I think if I got it I would just screw around exploring until I got bored of the shitty gameplay. though maybe that's good gameplay on its own? love me some exploration. that's what makes me play RPGs of any kind and specifically what ruined majora's mask for me, a time limit means no screwing around for an hour accomplishing nothing.

hey, serious question, do you guys feel like trolling sucks now? I feel like trolling sucks now. not here, you guys are old school, but just in general

it used to be... there was a knack to it, but basically you say just one or two things that you know will cause somebody to blow up at you, and you, in turn, rofl and lmao, right? there's supposed to be an "above-it" feel. becsuse the point was that the goobers getting trolled were mostly doing it to themselves. to get trolled you had to not have the wisdom to recognize when getting riled up probably wasn't going to change anything about what you're getting riled up about. the power of it, the maniacal magical joy, was that choosing to laugh not only provoked impotent rage, but in turn was provoked by it

  but isn't it kind of a hazing ritual? like, they're supposed to grow up and learn to talk to people, so they can join in on actual structured conversation, right? and I mean if they don't, lol. they can keep being terrible and you can keep not taking them seriously. it's constructive chaos. I mean that's how it went when I joined up here. the people that trolled you only trolled you until you grew up, because after that it's not trolling anymore, and then, guess what? you're in the club! you and your would-be bullies could go on to have chill funny conversations and crack jokes and poke fun at the people who still hadn't caught on to the fact that it's just not all so dicking serious.

now it seems like trolling has devolved into this, like... insane, pointless activity where you spend hours a day combing the internet for things that actively piss you off, and then you focus sustained aggression on them, regardless of how they react? it's The Actual Complete Fucking Opposite of the point.
the mark is no longer doing it to themselves, it's now the trolls themselves that transparently care way too much, to the point that they're marginalizing their own goddamned lives just to be slightly better at being a pissed off internet weirdo. and then they get mad that people get mad at them??? I don't understand this way of living! why get them mad at you in the first place if all it does is upset you in kind? you've replaced a delightful and inconsequential cycle of giggles with a machine that does nothing but promote mutual acrimony you sick motherfucking baka

yeah modern "trolling" is just two people addicted to vitriol screaming at each other through comment sections. nowadays the internet is a shitty strip mall where all the actually good stores are boarded up or got turned into a starbucks. it's also crowded as fuck and everybody around you is mindlessly spewing memes and socio-political platitudes in a way that seems eerily like newspeak.

[GreyClock]

hey, serious question, do you guys feel like trolling sucks now? I feel like trolling sucks now. not here, you guys are old school, but just in general

it used to be... there was a knack to it, but basically you say just one or two things that you know will cause somebody to blow up at you, and you, in turn, rofl and lmao, right? there's supposed to be an "above-it" feel. becsuse the point was that the goobers getting trolled were mostly doing it to themselves. to get trolled you had to not have the wisdom to recognize when getting riled up probably wasn't going to change anything about what you're getting riled up about. the power of it, the maniacal magical joy, was that choosing to laugh not only provoked impotent rage, but in turn was provoked by it

  but isn't it kind of a hazing ritual? like, they're supposed to grow up and learn to talk to people, so they can join in on actual structured conversation, right? and I mean if they don't, lol. they can keep being terrible and you can keep not taking them seriously. it's constructive chaos. I mean that's how it went when I joined up here. the people that trolled you only trolled you until you grew up, because after that it's not trolling anymore, and then, guess what? you're in the club! you and your would-be bullies could go on to have chill funny conversations and crack jokes and poke fun at the people who still hadn't caught on to the fact that it's just not all so dicking serious.

now it seems like trolling has devolved into this, like... insane, pointless activity where you spend hours a day combing the internet for things that actively piss you off, and then you focus sustained aggression on them, regardless of how they react? it's The Actual Complete Fucking Opposite of the point.
the mark is no longer doing it to themselves, it's now the trolls themselves that transparently care way too much, to the point that they're marginalizing their own goddamned lives just to be slightly better at being a pissed off internet weirdo. and then they get mad that people get mad at them??? I don't understand this way of living! why get them mad at you in the first place if all it does is upset you in kind? you've replaced a delightful and inconsequential cycle of giggles with a machine that does nothing but promote mutual acrimony you sick motherfucking baka

yeah modern "trolling" is just two people addicted to vitriol screaming at each other through comment sections. nowadays the internet is a shitty strip mall where all the actually good stores are boarded up or got turned into a starbucks. it's also crowded as fuck and everybody around you is mindlessly spewing memes and socio-political platitudes in a way that seems eerily like newspeak.

That shit's everywhere and it's always so very predictable and uncreative. You know, that whole mantra about the internet: "everybody's connected", sounds very democratic and wonderful on paper, but in reality, there's a whole lot of stupid fucking people around. That's who you're connected to, and some of these people probably believe they are "trolling", but are really budding rageaholics or something, others might be subnormals expressing their actual opinions. A lot of people don't know how to critically assess the value of their sources and take everything at face value. When I worked in the wonderful world of unskilled labor, there were guys there who a) were at the absolute zenith of their capabilities with that job (put x of [item] in box) and b) wouldn't stop chewing my ear off with that infowars conspiracy dogshit. Everyone's not equal, but most people think they are (or probably even a smidge better). Like the other day I had an argument with my dad about some medical procedure he thinks he needs. My dad's knowledge on the subject is limited to a few newspaper articles (maybe) and Wikipedia (probably). There were also a general practioner and a medical specialist in the mix. The latter rejected my dad's request based on his medical opinion. "What does he know?" was my dad's (unironic) response. In his mind his opinion is equal to that of the GP and to that of the specialist, when in reality it's: my dad [...a...giant...fucking...chasm...of...a...gap...] GP [...gap...] specialist. A certain amount of scepticism is a good thing, but people need to consider their own limitations and shortcomings. Few do, everyone's a fucking expert on everything. Everyone's finding their soapboxes online, in the weirdest places. Like there's this bitter old man who lives in the comments section of the website of a local newspaper, and whenever an article mentions something even vaguely connected to students he goes on these weird tirades about how every student is a drunk and college is nonsense anyway and it's costing him a fortune in taxes and he never went to college and... Which is funny at first, but it gets kind of tiresome after a while. Someone like that probably bitched exclusively to family and (a lack of) friends in the not too distant past. And that's just one example in the very depressing, endless sea of shit that is the internet.

P.S. Flounderbutt, my cat really likes your signature, he was tap tap tapping away at it.

[FLOUNDERMAN_CLOCK]

P.S. Flounderbutt, my cat really likes your signature, he was tap tap tapping away at it.

you have a cool cat with good taste in asshole hummingbird gifs. I think I've finally peaked with my avatar and signature at this point.

[GreyClock]

Did any of you dogfuckers ever quit smoking? I quit smoking after like a decade, but everytime I get drunk I make these plans like "tomorrow I'm gonna start again, because life is shit anyway", but in the mornings I never do. I quit three months ago and this shit is still going on. Me making weird posts in the middle of the night on various forums, Yahoo Answers mostly. That said, quitting was as impulsive a move as ever starting, I'm not exactly sure why I quit in the first place, I was enjoying myself. "Because you don't want lung cancer." "I don't? Brain cancer, blood cancer, bone cancer, colon cancer, prostate cancer, pancreas cancer, stomach cancer, leg cancer, shoulder cancer, scrotum cancer, eyebrow cancer, fucking dick cancer."

[GreyClock]

A warm welcome to our newest member, the fair nation of Thailand.

[GreyClock]

Emphysema.

[GreyClock]

"Emphysema."

[VCRClock]

Did any of you dogfuckers ever quit smoking? I quit smoking after like a decade, but everytime I get drunk I make these plans like "tomorrow I'm gonna start again, because life is shit anyway", but in the mornings I never do. I quit three months ago and this shit is still going on. Me making weird posts in the middle of the night on various forums, Yahoo Answers mostly. That said, quitting was as impulsive a move as ever starting, I'm not exactly sure why I quit in the first place, I was enjoying myself. "Because you don't want lung cancer." "I don't? Brain cancer, blood cancer, bone cancer, colon cancer, prostate cancer, pancreas cancer, stomach cancer, leg cancer, shoulder cancer, scrotum cancer, eyebrow cancer, fucking dick cancer."

I think you're the only person I've ever known that seemed disappointed in themselves for not taking up smoking again

[Slurpee]

my dad quit smoking and drinking, uh, not at the same time, but both after doing it for decades, and he just went cold turkey with zero side effects, and treats it like it's no big deal whatsoever. he's like "well I wanted to stop so I just stopped"
that's supposed to be something dads say, not something they can actually do, jeeze

[Slurpee]

I wonder if the new season of stranger things is going to find a way to write the kid that disappeared out again, or if they have to try to recapture the chemistry of the cool 80's friend kids with this extra damn kid in there now.

he had maybe two scenes with them in the first season, and they didn't plan on a second? kid's a regular Justin Bartha!


I say, the kid's a regular JUSTIN BARTHA!

[BilliardBall10]

yeah modern "trolling" is just two people addicted to vitriol screaming at each other through comment sections. nowadays the internet is a shitty strip mall where all the actually good stores are boarded up or got turned into a starbucks. it's also crowded as fuck and everybody around you is mindlessly spewing memes and socio-political platitudes in a way that seems eerily like newspeak.

it's also crowded as fuck and everybody around you is mindlessly spewing memes and socio-political platitudes in a way that seems eerily like newspeak.

memes and socio-political platitudes in a way that seems eerily like newspeak.

platitudes

https://postimg.org/image/tjgfspnlf/

[RobClock]

I'd take up smoking in a heartbeat if it weren't so goddamn expensive

[Slurpee]

yeah it's so cool lol

I wish I was a cool smoking guy who didn't give a nuh about nuthin

also the lines about where it's legal are so fucking fiddly? might just be a California thing but it's illegal in any indoor public place and the streets of Hayward, but not the Bart station, legal in designated smoking areas on college campuses, legal in Castro Valley, but not within a certain distance of... schools and hospitals? you can smoke inside your own house, but it makes it harder to sell things on ebay. also, hotel rooms will charge you extra? who can keep track of this shit? I'm not going to take up an addiction I have to pass an exam to indulge, no matter how cool it is

[PhantomCatClock]

There's a company that makes cigarettes that might ACTUALLY only exist in Texas, and they're called Red Camels


no, not Camel Reds, or anything to do with Camel, the tobacco giant, but believe me that hope of people driving through the state and getting confused and thinking they're Camels on sale is all they have going for them. I've known two people who smoked them: a kid at Six Flags who got his for free and my sister who was happy to be paying less than $3 for a pack again, only to find there were little worms in them





Smokers ARE cool and I heard someone say it's because they always have cool stories to tell because they have to go outside a lot and, like at grocery stores and stuff, end up meeting a lot of people and talking to them out on the street while they smoke, and a lot of homeless people hang out to bum smokes off smokers, too



but smoking isn't cool, kids











it just makes YOU cool

[Slurpee]

you don't have to smoke to hang out with homeless people, you can just be a weirdo like me

[PhantomCatClock]

I used to buy pizzas for homeless people back when I rode the bus

now I just walk everywhere, tho


but man, you can really tell who's like, only temporarily homeless and who is even less focused on reality than stupid internet nerds like us

I actually kept a journal of the things they said, with meticulous details on names and gossip that they said to me, because a lot of the stories were super cool (most were just like how they got in their immediate situation and how their family/other homeless person are assholesâ€"never felt bad writing it down when I got home because 1) not gonna share it and 2) so what if I forget parts or get parts wrong? I'm just the fiftieth iteration in this game of telephone anyway so there's no need to value accuracy)

[Slurpee]

yeah the Homeless homeless people always have rambly stories that I usually don't completely understand, but you can tell it's important to them to get it out so I'm just like yeah

[GreyClock]

my dad quit smoking and drinking, uh, not at the same time, but both after doing it for decades, and he just went cold turkey with zero side effects, and treats it like it's no big deal whatsoever. he's like "well I wanted to stop so I just stopped"
that's supposed to be something dads say, not something they can actually do, jeeze

The day I quit smoking I felt a little weird and tense, but that's about it. The cravings only kick in when I'm drinking. Thing is, when I'm sober I'm seriously considering cutting back on my drinking, or maybe even quitting as well, because I'm starting to get bored with it too. Especially because there's no middle ground between drinking nothing and drinking everything. Although it's hard to imagine myself as some sort of teetotaler.

[GreyClock]

Once this homeless guy asked me for fifty cents to make a telephone call. This was in the time of payphones. I gave it to him and he went into the booth and punched in a bunch of numbers and waited the longest time for an answer, which never came. You could really tell he was dissappointed: a shrug, a shake of the head, a sigh. Although he shouldn't have been too surprised, because I noticed he only grazed the coin slot with the coin. So it was all some elaborate mime act for my benefit, which was kind of sweet, like otherwise I'm gonna ask for my money back or something. Or maybe he was just fucking insane.