h-o-t t-o g-t-f-o-o-h-k-w-a-y-d-g-g-t-f-o-o-h-y-s-i-f-w-a-d-g-t-f-o

[VCRClock]

I should add that I researched the entire half A press video

[PhantomCatClock]

I've actually kept following that channel and, while he mostly talks about (incredibly esoteric) glitches, I'm happy to say there are a few videos that make the one Slurpee linked look sane

[VCRClock]

I should add that autocorrect changed "rewatched" to "researched" fuck my pitiful life

[Slurpee]

I should add that autocorrect changed "rewatched" to "researched" fuck my pitiful life

oh lol
I just accepted it
I was like "damn VCR was in the weeds with him on that huh"

[PhantomCatClock]

i had a bazooka joe pack LAST YEAR and nothing changed. I don't mean that it's the hardtack of gum, I mean I got comics that I remembered not only the punchline to, but the fortune from





so I saw a pack recently. Said "NEW COMICS!!!" on it. Figured that was a wrapper that got printed in 1985 and is just now barely getting used, but I grabbed it anyway

THE GUM WAS WAY BRIGHTER PINK, ALMOST RED. NO POWDERED SUGAR (potato dust? whatever it is). GUM IS okay it's still pretty hard BUT IT'S WAY SOFTER AND THE FLAVOR IS STRONGER THAN I REMEMBERED

THE COMIC'S VIBRANT

IT'S NEW


I'm not a expert but they've DEFINITELY never had sports jargon did-ye-knows, and these guest appearances are some FRESH athletes. These are new ballzooka joe comics.

These should last me a month, but I need a second one just to see. Hah, another sports jargon one. This one was about baseball, so I already knew the term. Deep cuts, though. Man, the color ink is all aligned. The text is easy to read... I might upgrade to buying TWO per year so they can have some hope of ever paying off that new laser printer

I go to bed, dreaming of rapscallions just-a meanin' no harm as they roam the city looking for cans to recycle to buy more gum

Next morning, before breakfast, I see my remaining eight Bazookums on the counter. Oh, what the hell, my mouth's not dry this morning.






...........hmm.






that's a third sports lingo did-you-know in a row.



A lingo did-you-know Talk Like A Pro (With Joe!) (actual title. Couldn't miss the rhyme).

Okay, whatever. So it's fun activities instead of jokes all the time, now. Maybe i'll get a tiny sudoku in the next one, or a wordsearch I need a magnifying glass for. Hey, this one's a basketball term I knew existed but didn't know the meaning of. Guess they're really interested in bringing Joe back. I can't help but wonder who the sponsor is, here... I can't imagine Bazooka Joe is the one who paid the NFL.

I go to work, but my thoughts are altered, orbiting around my new basketball term.



I return, open the fourth--


fuck



--open the fifth, the sixth, the seventh, the eighth. Unchewed gum bricks pile on the counter. Sports terms.


THE REMAINING TWO. IT'S ALL SPORTS! IT'S THE SAME DRAWING OF JOE AND A CARICATURE OF REAL HUMANS, AND A SPORTS TERM. AAAAAAAAAAAARUERHEUHREUGH ok but the printing quality is really good now 10/10 recommend

[Slurpee]

they were still printing bazooka joe comics with the same equipment from the 1950's and finally ran out of their ancient ink cartridges and it would cost more to make more of the old ink cartridges than to just get all new equipmemt. I just made that up but it's what happened

[Slurpee]

https://creepylink.com/

[VCRClock]

well I'm glad someone at private equity understands at least a little about what's important to Joe-heads: opening up your 8th brick of gum and getting deja vu, and the comic not being funny (an important part of Joe's character; a natural extension of barely having enough space to put words in the comic.) furthermore it is a return to proud American tradition: in packages which contain both printed material and gum, at least one of these items is meant to be practically useless for its ostensible purpose

however, I think switching to a contemporary print process is really going to kill what distinguishes Joe in a market where everything has become either CMYK or black

to be honest, while this does seem like the work of a sports memorabilia company realizing that gum is now more popular than sports and attempting to use its gum-adjacent platform to make children care about Bronny James instead of Roblox -- I don't think the sports community would throw a lifesaver to a drowning Joe. unless they were to turn the strip over to an alt-cartoonist and alienate Middle America so hard that someone would swoop in to defend the status quo.

anyway, you've seen https://linkedin.c1ic.link/exploit_njaPJo_reset_password.scr I'm sure.

slightly more off the beaten path: I had https://microsoft.c1ic.link/MEIe8x_download_now.dll open in a tab on my phone for a while, but it must have been a couple of years ago because site is dead now. even though obsessive completist b-joe scholarship seems like it deserves to live on the internet forever. hug your favorite websites and tell them you love them, you may not get another chance

[Slurpee]

I just want to say I really enjoyed that post

[Slurpee]

just upgraded from a 10 1/2 year old iphone 6s to a 6 1/2 year old iphone 11 pro max

on top of the world, the coolest kid in the neighborhood

[Slurpee]

I bet it's really hard to machine translate text about etymology

like if I said "the adjectival use of alto in spanish comes from the latin altus, for height or growing, while the imperative use, meaning stop, is borrowed from the german halt, from *haldan, a protogermanic word for hold, cognate with alt in italian and hold in english. the idea that the imperative alto is a false cognate that comes from raising your hands in surrender appears to be folk etymology"

any word that's the subject of the etymological explanation and the words it's related to would have to remain in the language that the text was originally written in, but any words explaining the relationship would have to be translated, and whether those words would be intuitively understood in another language is subjective and conveying it properly in a new language is not just a matter of disentangling metalanguage from the object languages but a creative task- e.g. if you were translating to spanish you would have to add language to convey that "hold" means "sostener" in english

I mean now there's llms, but I bet even they would struggle with this kind of thing. even if you did an initial pass sort of delineating the semantics in a more machine-interpretable way, inferring semantic cues statistically can only get you so far

I don't feel like checking though

[PhantomCatClock]

they can't even handle english properly



sometimes I'll say "Hey Siri, what's the abbreviation for tablespoons?" just to check that she's still fuckin' stupid, or say "Hey Siri, what time is it? It's thirteen forty-five" or some other time just to hear her lose her mind

[PhantomCatClock]

and I know we're talking about different parts of this stack, right




but in a way, we really aren't. Places where data is moved from one system to the next, be they the literal interfaces or just programming ones, are the first weak links to check, and they just don't, because it'd be folly

[Slurpee]

oh ok thanks paypal

[PhantomCatClock]

isekai'd into the last thread you posted in

[PhantomCatClock]

rock music starts

guy starts screaming

opens a cupboard and.. potatoes fall out? cereal? I don't remember. Something.

slams thing in microwave, types 666, presses start

screen says "59 seconds later"

microwave dings and pulls the thing out

guy still screaming, moves closer to camera, scream pitch goes up

another shot

shot of him moving farther from camera, pitch goes down

microwaved.. something. Milk and cereal? I think he opens a cereal bag and there's a shot of his mouth being blasted with a leafblower, but I remember a ton of food falling out of a cupboard, so maybe he was microwaving something else

this video was.. 2005? 2004? 2006? google videos. Maybe 07

very short, by the time's standard. Maybe thirty seconds, maybe sixty. I think it was intended to loop, too

i have no expectation of ever being reunited with this video, just had to write it down because I was astounded at how much of it i remembered

[PhantomCatClock]

he never walked, either. He scooted around like he was on a skateboard and someone below the frame was pushing him

[PhantomCatClock]

hey nevermind i found it


i'd been googling/youtube searching for a hour but i found it like five minutes after posting here

ok bye

[PhantomCatClock]

also i found a video of the Gundam 0083 opening where it ticks up to 69 instead of 83 and the guy looks up at it and smiles

"that is a very slurpee smile" i think to myself





you're just going to have to imagine though because i can only see it on Know Thy Meme and Twitter and i don't wanna link to either of those

can find it by googling gundam starburst 69 tho

[Slurpee]

don't worry I am a thief

https://streamable.com/ghdp6j